WEBVTT
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If you were to grow up
in the best of all places...
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It would be our Little Italy.
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- We had the perfect childhood.
- Well, maybe some would say
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we weren't so perfect.
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- Him, for instance.
- Yeah, definitely him.
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Ready, set, go!
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God, we were
such little shits, weren't we?
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Poor Mr. Ganucci.
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Let's go.
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- Whoo-hoo!
- Let's go, Leo!
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He's gonna get us!
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See you, Mr. Ganucci!
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I'm gonna feed you
to the worms!
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To us, Little Italy
wasn'tjust a few city blocks.
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Hi, Mr. Patelli.
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- Hey, kids.
- Hey, Mario.
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It was our entire world.
We knew everyone.
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And everyone knew us.
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Nikki, even back then,
you had a reputation.
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- What?
- As being super competitive.
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- Excuse me!
- I mean, you always wanted to beat me.
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- Show me what you got.
- I did beat you.
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- When I let you.
- Seriously?
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- See? I won.
- Won what? A concussion?
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Are you okay?
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I love that I can beat you, stupido.
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Yeah, yeah. I know you do, stupida.
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Come on.
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- Wanna race me now?
- Ha!
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Hey! Hey!
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So, being Italian
is about three things.
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- Tradition...
- Passion...
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And pride.
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And we were raised on all of it.
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- Leo, do you wanna dance with me?
- Not in a million years.
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After a week
of great food and festivities,
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tomorrow for the first time ever,
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we're gonna announce the winner
of Little Italy's Best Pizza!
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- That's right!
- By our two celebrity judges...
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Us!
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So, venite tutti.
Come on down, everyone!
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Join in!
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And here it is,
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Little Italy's pride and joy...
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- Pizza Napoli.
- Slow down!
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Where our families
made the best pizza in the world.
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Look out!
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It was always
full of love and chaos.
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But delicious chaos.
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Okay! I got one
large pepperoni, two regular slice...
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Our fathers were best friends.
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Uh... sometimes.
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How we doin', Ma?
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See the good-looking guy there
tasting the sauce?
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That's my pa, Salvatore Angioli.
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The maestro of marinara.
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And the guy spinning?
My pa, Vincenzo Campoli.
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- The don of dough.
- Really? The don?
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- That is such a stereotype.
- No, no. It's poetic.
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Hey, Vince! How do you get your crust
to be so thin and crispy?
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Well, Mikey, that's a family secret.
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And the secret is...
Two teaspoons of nunya!
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Nunya? What's nunya?
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It's nunya business, Mikey!
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Hey, Mikey, what about
my mother's special sauce, huh?
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Mama Angi, what's your secret?
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Every time I make the sauce,
I say three Hail Mary.
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- I love that woman.
- See?
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From God above this sauce comes.
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Mangiare, everybody! Mangiare!
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You have hungry customers
and pizza to make!
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- Let these people wait a little.
- Yeah, save that for later.
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- All right?
- Not in front of the kids.
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How do you think the kids got here?
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Well, I know that,
but they don't know that.
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My parents...
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Every day, they danced to "Al di la."
And so did they.
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That's enough.
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Were you playing in a pigsty?
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- I won.
- I let her.
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- Did not.
- Did, too.
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Go get cleaned.
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My daughter's a champion goalie!
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And her father won't stop
bragging about it.
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- Ah, shut up.
- Nah, you shut up.
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Hey, Leo. Leo.
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Go see Nonno make the dough.
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- Leo, I got a call from Mr. Ganucci.
- It was Nikki.
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- Why did he say that?
- Leo, wash your hands.
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Okay, Nonno.
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Don't skimp on the cheese.
Don't skimp!
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Take a shot.
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Gently. Gentle.
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The thing is you gotta treat it
like it's a beautiful lady.
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My grandfather, my nonno,
he's all charm.
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- Someday, you're gonna thank me for that.
- Too bad he didn't pass it along.
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Nicoletta, squeeze the love
out of every tomato
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like it was the last... No!
Too... too... too hard.
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Too hard. You can't force love.
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Never squeeze the love
out of a man's heart.
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If he don't give it freely,
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you don't want it.
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Nonna knows.
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What does "al di la" mean?
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Beyond everything...
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there's you.
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God! I was so moony over you!
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- What was wrong with me?
- What can I say? I'm irresistible.
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- I won!
- I won.
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- Unbelievable.
- Come on.
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Thank you.
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Come on, pal.
I'll buy you a beer at Luigi's.
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Oh, no. No, Sal. Tomorrow.
The contest is tomorrow.
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What are you worried about?
My sauce, your crust!
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We're unbeatable!
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Our husbands, huh?
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- Like an old married couple.
- Which one wears the pants?
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- We do.
- I heard that.
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I'm going to church
to light a candle for the boys.
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Thank you, Ma.
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- A winning candle.
- May I join you, signora?
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- Sì.
- Grazie.
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Life was perfect.
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And our families were inseparable.
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I mean, how could
a bond this strong ever be broken?
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I have no idea!
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But... that was then.
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And this is now.
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I went away.
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- Yeah, more like ran away.
- From you.
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- Hey, wait a minute!
- Okay, we'll get to that later.
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Actually, I went to learn how to cook,
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like, four Michelin stars cook,
from the Chef Corrine.
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Picture Gordon Ramsay but prettier.
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The only thing sharper than your knives
are your senses.
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Anything less than perfection is what?
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- Failure, Chef.
- And scarier.
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Limp...
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like my last husband.
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Oil is a garnish.
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You've used so much,
the US Army will invade the plate.
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You are a what?
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- Moron sandwich.
- No, I can't hear you.
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Moron sandwich!
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Pathetic.
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Nicole. Gareth.
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Collect your things
and see me in my office.
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The rest of you, class is dismissed.
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I expect everything to be spotless
in the morning.
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Yes, Chef.
00:08:09.520 --> 00:08:11.720
This'll be quick.
I'll get right to the point.
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I think you're both done here now.
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- No, I can do better, Chef.
- No, Chef! Please.
00:08:16.360 --> 00:08:18.397
- Please.
- Oh, stop whining, you ninnies!
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I'm opening up a new place in Mayfair.
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Something millennial-friendly.
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Trendy, fast and very expensive.
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Well, that's the perfect complement
to your brand, Chef.
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Fast, casual. It's brilliant, chef.
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Enough with the ass kissing!
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I know you both would kill
to work there, so...
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I'm planning on hiring...
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one of you.
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You'll each have two weeks
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in which to come up
with a completely new menu.
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Wow me,
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then you and your winning menu
will be the toast of Mayfair.
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Don't just stand there looking gobsmacked.
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- You won't be disappointed, Chef.
- Thank you.
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Oh, Nicole.
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If you want the job, you're going to have
to have your visa changed
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- from student to work at once.
- Yes, Chef.
00:09:08.800 --> 00:09:10.880
That means you're going
to have to go back to Canada.
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- I have to go home?
- I know. I feel your pain,
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but it'll only be for a week or two.
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Oh, don't forget to pack
your mukluks or whatnot.
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Probably the last place
I wanted to go back to was...
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Little Italy.
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Our Little Italy.
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- Hey, Carlo.
- Hey! Ciao, ciao!
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All right. You ready?
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In the net! There it is.
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All right, guys, I gotta take off.
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I'll see you next week.
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- Where nothing changes.
- Hey. Bruno.
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What's up, man? Looks good this year.
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And yet, everything is different.
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You see, our fathers, they had a fight.
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A fight? It was more like a war.
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Yeah, a pizza war.
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- My dad moved his shop.
- All the way next door.
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And since then,
00:10:03.400 --> 00:10:05.915
our families haven't
exactly been on speaking terms.
00:10:06.040 --> 00:10:08.600
Technically.
They still swear at each other
00:10:08.680 --> 00:10:10.672
- with occasional hand gestures.
- Hey, Leo.
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Hey there. You know, we deliver.
00:10:14.040 --> 00:10:15.315
I bet he does.
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Disgrazia!
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Again?
00:10:23.880 --> 00:10:24.880
Hey!
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Seriously?
00:10:27.360 --> 00:10:30.558
And it all started the day
that they won the best pizza contest.
00:10:30.920 --> 00:10:32.957
And why they fought,
they've never said.
00:10:33.320 --> 00:10:34.896
Pop swears
he'll take it to the grave.
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Mine, too.
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Hey!
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Hey.
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Leo.
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Hey, how come the only thing
my son's good at is being late?
00:10:49.360 --> 00:10:51.920
Miss Rossini asked me
to help her move some furniture.
00:10:52.360 --> 00:10:54.272
The bed or the couch?
00:10:54.720 --> 00:10:56.473
Or perhaps the kitchen table?
00:10:56.560 --> 00:10:57.640
Jogi!
00:10:58.160 --> 00:11:00.277
That is not our trash.
00:11:00.720 --> 00:11:03.474
You take that trash
and you throw it in the dumpster of...
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- He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named.
- You got it, Boss.
00:11:07.280 --> 00:11:09.670
Guy over there wants
a pizza Margherita with no sauce.
00:11:10.000 --> 00:11:12.674
No sauce? Why? What's wrong with my sauce?
00:11:12.760 --> 00:11:14.336
Nothing. That's what he wants.
00:11:14.360 --> 00:11:17.080
Hey! Yo! Yeah, you! Four eyes!
00:11:17.160 --> 00:11:19.016
Why don't you take your one good eye
and go next door,
00:11:19.040 --> 00:11:20.713
look for the naked pizza over there?
00:11:20.800 --> 00:11:22.473
Go to that bottega, see what he gives ya!
00:11:22.560 --> 00:11:24.756
His sauce is no good anyway, you pervert!
00:11:24.840 --> 00:11:27.355
You want naked pizza? Get outta here!
Go on! Get outta here!
00:11:28.440 --> 00:11:31.274
We're going broke,
and you're yelling at the customer?
00:11:31.360 --> 00:11:33.079
You gotta get on with the times, Pa.
00:11:34.120 --> 00:11:36.476
I mean, people today,
they want some variety.
00:11:36.680 --> 00:11:40.390
Health-conscious toppings
or paper-thin, you know, square slices.
00:11:40.880 --> 00:11:42.473
There's just so much that we can do!
00:11:42.960 --> 00:11:43.996
Are you hearing this?
00:11:44.080 --> 00:11:46.675
Your grandson, he wants to make
square pizza for hippies.
00:11:46.880 --> 00:11:48.678
Hippies are back? I liked them.
00:11:48.880 --> 00:11:49.880
Those girls...
00:11:50.160 --> 00:11:51.719
They burn bras.
00:11:52.520 --> 00:11:54.751
No, not hippies. Hipsters, Nonno.
00:11:54.840 --> 00:11:55.840
Millennials.
00:11:56.080 --> 00:11:57.456
And you know what else wouldn't hurt?
00:11:57.480 --> 00:12:00.279
If we got online, and like,
did an app or something.
00:12:00.800 --> 00:12:02.800
I mean, we gotta get
business flowing in here again
00:12:02.880 --> 00:12:05.216
like, you know, back in the good
old days when you and Sal...
00:12:05.240 --> 00:12:06.240
Hey!
00:12:06.400 --> 00:12:08.596
My vangina! You said his name!
00:12:08.680 --> 00:12:11.434
Angina, and your heart is on this side.
00:12:12.640 --> 00:12:14.518
Nobody tells me where my heart is.
00:12:14.600 --> 00:12:16.319
Excuse me, will my pizza be long?
00:12:17.040 --> 00:12:19.680
No, no. Your pizza will be round,
00:12:20.120 --> 00:12:22.077
covered with sauce and cheese on it.
00:12:22.160 --> 00:12:24.072
Welcome to Vince's!
00:12:24.600 --> 00:12:26.240
Come for the pizza,
00:12:26.880 --> 00:12:28.439
stay for the abuse.
00:12:28.720 --> 00:12:29.870
I'm taking a walk.
00:12:30.080 --> 00:12:31.816
I'll join you.
I'm going to Sal's.
00:12:31.840 --> 00:12:32.990
Hey, hey! Leo, Leo!
00:12:33.080 --> 00:12:35.515
You gotta stay late tonight
'cause the place needs a cleanup.
00:12:35.800 --> 00:12:38.634
No, I can't, Pa.
I gotta work my shift at Luigi's.
00:12:39.080 --> 00:12:41.754
You ought to be working here,
not tending bar over in that dive
00:12:41.840 --> 00:12:44.400
for that Luigi character.
He's no Neapolitan.
00:12:44.640 --> 00:12:46.552
Let's face it, Pa.
You can't pay me enough,
00:12:46.640 --> 00:12:48.950
and this way, I get free rent.
It's a win-win.
00:12:49.240 --> 00:12:51.516
Honey, you can come back home
any time you like.
00:12:51.600 --> 00:12:54.752
You just make sure that those puttanellis
don't climb through the window.
00:12:54.840 --> 00:12:57.196
You know why?
'Cause God made you too gorgeous.
00:12:58.880 --> 00:13:00.314
I love you. I'll see you, Pa.
00:13:00.720 --> 00:13:02.518
Where's that mouth been?
00:13:02.960 --> 00:13:03.996
That's your son.
00:13:04.800 --> 00:13:06.314
My vangina.
00:13:07.680 --> 00:13:10.275
I don't know, Jogi.
You really think you're ready for this?
00:13:10.360 --> 00:13:12.716
Oh, yes, sir! I am ready, Mr. Leo.
00:13:12.800 --> 00:13:16.714
I would give my left testicle
to deliver pizza Leo-style.
00:13:17.560 --> 00:13:19.000
All right. I gotta warn you, though.
00:13:19.080 --> 00:13:20.878
The ladies at this address...
00:13:22.120 --> 00:13:23.416
- they're wild, okay?
- Oh!
00:13:23.440 --> 00:13:25.716
So just promise me
you'll be careful, yeah?
00:13:25.800 --> 00:13:27.136
- Yeah.
- All right, here. Take it.
00:13:27.160 --> 00:13:28.389
Thank you, Mr. Leo!
00:13:28.640 --> 00:13:30.921
Knock yourself out, yeah?
00:13:31.600 --> 00:13:34.160
Oh, I will be knocking...
00:13:35.600 --> 00:13:37.432
Hard.
00:13:37.840 --> 00:13:38.990
Jogi!
00:13:40.200 --> 00:13:42.954
Next time I see you on Sal's territory,
00:13:43.040 --> 00:13:45.475
I'll squash you
like a malaria mosquito in Mumbai.
00:13:46.560 --> 00:13:48.552
They say Karma
is a real bitch.
00:13:48.960 --> 00:13:50.394
Are the two of you related?
00:13:51.000 --> 00:13:53.560
- Jessie, are you out?
- Coming, boss!
00:13:53.800 --> 00:13:55.200
Just taking out the trash.
00:13:55.280 --> 00:13:57.960
Don't forget the trash
that comes out of that mouth of yours!
00:13:58.000 --> 00:13:59.116
Get out!
00:13:59.960 --> 00:14:01.189
Take out the trash.
00:14:02.200 --> 00:14:04.874
Oof. Jessie, why does today's sauce
smell like cat puke?
00:14:06.520 --> 00:14:07.520
Curry powder.
00:14:07.760 --> 00:14:09.877
- Oh!
- Jogi! Son of a bitch.
00:14:09.960 --> 00:14:12.429
That monster messed
with my mother's sauce.
00:14:12.520 --> 00:14:14.216
- We will get them, Boss.
- Okay.
00:14:14.240 --> 00:14:15.515
- What?
- All right.
00:14:16.400 --> 00:14:17.550
You don't seem too upset,
00:14:17.640 --> 00:14:19.597
which must mean you have worse planned.
00:14:19.840 --> 00:14:23.038
Honey, let's just say tomorrow
is gonna be a high holiday.
00:14:23.640 --> 00:14:25.440
Here's a fresh batch.
00:14:25.480 --> 00:14:27.472
- Mama!
- Dio mio, this is heavy!
00:14:27.560 --> 00:14:30.473
This is heavy.
00:14:30.560 --> 00:14:32.517
Your voice is no gift.
00:14:32.800 --> 00:14:34.473
You work too hard.
00:14:34.600 --> 00:14:37.240
Oh, but what,
you think the sauce make itself?
00:14:37.320 --> 00:14:38.816
Come on. Come with me. I want you to rest.
00:14:38.840 --> 00:14:40.194
No, I'll rest when I'm dead.
00:14:40.920 --> 00:14:44.470
Oh! Speaking of dead,
this is our dinner crowd!
00:14:45.080 --> 00:14:47.390
It's been a slow day, Ma.
00:14:47.480 --> 00:14:49.836
My bowels are slow. This is dead.
00:14:50.200 --> 00:14:52.317
I'm going to church for some excitement.
00:14:52.400 --> 00:14:54.551
Okay, listen, while you're there,
why don't you pray
00:14:54.640 --> 00:14:56.552
that the place next door goes up in smoke?
00:14:57.080 --> 00:14:59.993
Coglione! Your evil will end!
00:15:02.400 --> 00:15:03.629
Sal's Pizza. It's better.
00:15:05.040 --> 00:15:06.040
What?
00:15:06.120 --> 00:15:08.396
You're kiddin' me! Oh, my God!
00:15:08.600 --> 00:15:10.159
- What? What?
- Oh!
00:15:10.240 --> 00:15:11.240
What?
00:15:13.120 --> 00:15:14.713
Oh! Okay! It's Nikki!
00:15:14.800 --> 00:15:17.634
- What? Nikki? Nikki! Nik...
- No, she hung up!
00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:21.514
Nikki is coming home tomorrow.
00:15:21.600 --> 00:15:22.795
Hey! Nikki!
00:15:22.880 --> 00:15:24.234
Nikki's comin' home!
00:15:24.360 --> 00:15:25.360
Nikki's comin' home!
00:15:25.440 --> 00:15:26.616
- Now, you listen to me.
- What?
00:15:26.640 --> 00:15:29.109
My baby girl is comin' home
for the first time in five years.
00:15:29.240 --> 00:15:32.950
- If you ruin it with your farkakte feud...
- Oh, there it is! There it is.
00:15:33.040 --> 00:15:34.190
What?
00:15:34.280 --> 00:15:35.475
What, my "farkakte feud"!
00:15:35.560 --> 00:15:37.776
- It's my fault she left.
- I'm not saying it's your f...
00:15:37.800 --> 00:15:40.096
- You just said it's my fault!
- I did not say it's your fault!
00:15:40.120 --> 00:15:42.077
- You...
- I don't wanna hear it!
00:15:46.320 --> 00:15:48.198
Get it while it's hot!
00:15:49.520 --> 00:15:51.796
Get it while it's hot!
00:15:51.880 --> 00:15:53.280
Yoo-hoo!
00:15:53.720 --> 00:15:55.200
Ladies, please!
00:15:55.680 --> 00:15:56.830
One at a time!
00:16:05.240 --> 00:16:07.311
- Nikki? Oh, my God!
- Gina!
00:16:07.400 --> 00:16:09.039
- Oh, my God, it's you! Oh!
- Hi!
00:16:09.760 --> 00:16:11.956
Oh, my God! My girl's back!
00:16:14.200 --> 00:16:15.475
Look at you!
00:16:15.680 --> 00:16:16.875
You're all gorgeous!
00:16:16.960 --> 00:16:18.758
Okay. Where's the rest of your luggage?
00:16:20.600 --> 00:16:23.115
Oh, my God. You're not staying.
Your family's gonna disown you.
00:16:23.200 --> 00:16:25.317
They haven't seen you in,
like, five years!
00:16:25.400 --> 00:16:27.232
I know. I haven't told them yet.
00:16:27.320 --> 00:16:29.073
They think I'm arriving tomorrow.
I just...
00:16:29.160 --> 00:16:31.000
I need a drink
before I have that conversation.
00:16:31.080 --> 00:16:32.719
You need about 20.
00:16:32.800 --> 00:16:35.998
And since Joe's got the kids,
we've got the whole night.
00:16:37.280 --> 00:16:39.656
- Luigi's? Really?
- Like the good old days!
00:16:42.480 --> 00:16:45.075
Oh! Look at what
the cat dragged in.
00:16:47.000 --> 00:16:49.595
Wait till Luigi sees you.
00:16:49.680 --> 00:16:52.957
Oh, this bambolina
made me an offer I couldn't refuse.
00:16:53.040 --> 00:16:55.111
- So what's Luigi do?
- Hey, Luigi!
00:16:55.240 --> 00:16:57.596
Luigi takes care of business. Ciao, bella!
00:16:59.280 --> 00:17:01.590
Nicoletta!
00:17:01.680 --> 00:17:03.000
Oh, my God!
00:17:04.560 --> 00:17:05.914
You look so, uh...
00:17:06.160 --> 00:17:08.356
- Different?
- I was gonna say hot.
00:17:11.360 --> 00:17:12.360
Hey!
00:17:12.800 --> 00:17:14.280
Bentornato!
00:17:14.360 --> 00:17:16.272
In honor of your return.
00:17:17.760 --> 00:17:19.717
- Salut!
- Saluti!
00:17:20.840 --> 00:17:22.991
Okay. Give me gossip.
00:17:23.080 --> 00:17:25.720
Royal frickin' dirt. British Vogue.
00:17:26.360 --> 00:17:28.920
- What do you wanna know?
- You were seeing an investment banker.
00:17:29.200 --> 00:17:30.200
So?
00:17:30.240 --> 00:17:31.435
He had a...
00:17:31.520 --> 00:17:34.479
sizeable portfolio,
but not a clue how to manage it.
00:17:35.240 --> 00:17:37.040
I would've shown him how to invest.
00:17:37.200 --> 00:17:40.040
I bet Englishmen can get you to do
the filthiest stuff with that accent.
00:17:40.160 --> 00:17:43.836
You'd be surprised
how quickly that novelty wears off.
00:17:44.600 --> 00:17:46.398
I hear they're big on oral.
00:17:47.120 --> 00:17:48.520
Oh... yeah.
00:17:49.200 --> 00:17:50.600
All talk and nothing else.
00:17:51.640 --> 00:17:52.994
That's just like Italian men.
00:17:54.920 --> 00:17:55.920
Speaking of which...
00:18:00.240 --> 00:18:03.233
One, two. Just like that.
Then you'll hit it.
00:18:03.320 --> 00:18:05.789
Oh, my God. What is he doing here?
00:18:05.880 --> 00:18:07.837
He works here. You didn't know that?
00:18:29.520 --> 00:18:31.477
- You planned this.
- Of course I did!
00:18:32.040 --> 00:18:33.713
Remind me to kill you later.
00:18:34.240 --> 00:18:35.640
Here he comes.
00:18:36.200 --> 00:18:38.192
- Oh! Gina.
- Yo, Leo.
00:18:39.480 --> 00:18:41.278
- How you doing, Teresa?
- Pretty good.
00:18:43.520 --> 00:18:46.240
So, you guys gonna introduce me
to your friend here?
00:18:48.720 --> 00:18:50.074
You from these parts?
00:18:50.320 --> 00:18:51.879
Do I look like I'm from these parts?
00:18:51.960 --> 00:18:52.960
No, actually...
00:18:53.640 --> 00:18:54.640
You look sober.
00:18:55.760 --> 00:18:57.638
- Can I get you a drink?
- You can get me one.
00:18:58.080 --> 00:18:59.196
Or six.
00:19:00.280 --> 00:19:01.555
They still do battle here?
00:19:02.680 --> 00:19:04.273
Uh, yeah. Every Monday night.
00:19:05.320 --> 00:19:07.391
Best show in town, huh?
00:19:07.480 --> 00:19:09.278
- I see your dad's ahead.
- Of course.
00:19:13.160 --> 00:19:14.160
Here we go.
00:19:14.960 --> 00:19:15.960
Stupida.
00:19:18.240 --> 00:19:19.356
Saluti!
00:19:23.640 --> 00:19:24.835
Playing it safe?
00:19:28.440 --> 00:19:29.635
I'm not playing anything.
00:19:30.320 --> 00:19:32.152
I forgot. You hate to lose.
00:19:32.920 --> 00:19:33.920
So, tell me...
00:19:34.720 --> 00:19:35.995
Still living with your parents?
00:19:37.000 --> 00:19:38.912
Oh, no. He lives upstairs with me.
00:19:39.000 --> 00:19:41.231
Paesano bachelor pad style, right?
00:19:42.120 --> 00:19:44.191
So who's kicking your ass
at soccer these days?
00:19:44.280 --> 00:19:45.873
- Ooh.
- Come on. Please.
00:19:46.280 --> 00:19:47.919
I'm undefeated.
00:19:48.040 --> 00:19:49.554
Only because I left town.
00:19:54.600 --> 00:19:55.600
One second.
00:19:59.560 --> 00:20:01.517
Oh!
00:20:02.200 --> 00:20:03.520
Shall we take this outside?
00:20:04.000 --> 00:20:06.276
Oh, come on! You can't be serious.
00:20:07.440 --> 00:20:10.160
Uh... I don't know.
He looks pretty serious to me.
00:20:10.240 --> 00:20:11.151
He looks pretty serious.
00:20:11.240 --> 00:20:13.755
- I... I'm in heels.
- Do it!
00:20:13.840 --> 00:20:15.320
- And it's raining!
- Nikki!
00:20:15.440 --> 00:20:18.353
What's the matter?
You... afraid you might get...
00:20:18.800 --> 00:20:19.916
wet?
00:20:20.000 --> 00:20:21.639
I am. Oh, shit. Oh, my God.
00:20:21.720 --> 00:20:24.235
Did I just say that out loud?
Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
00:20:29.400 --> 00:20:30.400
I mean...
00:20:30.720 --> 00:20:33.280
- it's gonna be embarrassing...
- Yes!
00:20:33.640 --> 00:20:35.552
...for you.
00:20:35.640 --> 00:20:37.597
Andiamo!
00:20:37.680 --> 00:20:39.558
To the field!
00:20:39.640 --> 00:20:42.394
Nikki versus Leo, the rematch!
00:20:42.480 --> 00:20:44.233
It's gonna get messy, people!
00:20:45.840 --> 00:20:48.878
Okay, listen up. Okay.
00:20:50.000 --> 00:20:51.719
Nikki blocks a shot,
00:20:51.800 --> 00:20:54.360
Leo does a shot! Hey!
00:20:55.160 --> 00:20:56.640
Leo scores,
00:20:56.960 --> 00:20:59.156
Nikki does a shot. Hey!
00:20:59.520 --> 00:21:02.592
You do realize that I coach
the neighborhood soccer team now?
00:21:02.840 --> 00:21:04.559
That's a shame for those kids.
00:21:04.640 --> 00:21:05.710
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:21:06.840 --> 00:21:09.071
Come on, Nikki!
00:21:11.480 --> 00:21:13.312
Oh! Oh!
00:21:13.560 --> 00:21:15.836
How'd you stop that?
00:21:15.960 --> 00:21:17.314
- For you.
- Drink up!
00:21:17.960 --> 00:21:19.076
Come on, pizza boy!
00:21:22.200 --> 00:21:23.111
Shit!
00:21:23.200 --> 00:21:24.759
Oh!
00:21:24.840 --> 00:21:25.990
Shot for Nikki!
00:21:26.080 --> 00:21:28.390
Joey Junior has diarrhea.
I have to go. I'm so sorry.
00:21:28.480 --> 00:21:29.960
- Okay, okay.
- I gotta go. All right.
00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:31.320
What's wrong with my kids?
00:21:32.760 --> 00:21:35.639
- I wasn't ready!
- What kind of excuse is that?
00:21:35.720 --> 00:21:37.440
- You gotta be ready!
- Oh, come on!
00:21:55.080 --> 00:21:56.080
I scored!
00:22:06.440 --> 00:22:08.238
Okay. Whoa.
00:22:09.800 --> 00:22:11.757
Come on. Okay. Come on, guys.
00:22:11.840 --> 00:22:13.593
Oh, come on!
Where is everybody going?
00:22:13.680 --> 00:22:15.576
I can't do this anymore.
You two settle it on your own, okay?
00:22:15.600 --> 00:22:17.520
Just you and me now.
00:22:17.800 --> 00:22:19.314
All right, I'm calling the top left.
00:22:27.320 --> 00:22:28.436
I win again!
00:22:28.880 --> 00:22:30.320
Yeah, I let you.
00:22:37.280 --> 00:22:38.680
- Are you okay?
- Yeah.
00:22:39.440 --> 00:22:40.874
- You sure?
- Yeah.
00:23:07.800 --> 00:23:09.519
Oh!
00:23:19.160 --> 00:23:22.039
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
- Buongiorno, bella Nikki!
00:23:24.600 --> 00:23:26.512
You were amazing last night.
00:23:27.840 --> 00:23:30.309
- Luigi?
- You're so talented, you know?
00:23:30.400 --> 00:23:32.357
Hashtag skills, huh?
00:23:32.440 --> 00:23:35.000
No. No. No, no. no. no.
Good God, no!
00:23:36.320 --> 00:23:37.800
No, no, no, no. Come on.
00:23:37.880 --> 00:23:40.190
I just needed a clean pair
of junk trunks, huh?
00:23:54.000 --> 00:23:55.320
Good morning.
00:23:57.360 --> 00:23:58.360
Hi.
00:23:59.440 --> 00:24:00.440
Hangover?
00:24:02.000 --> 00:24:04.310
No, just jet lag.
00:24:05.640 --> 00:24:06.960
Yeah, me, too.
00:24:11.640 --> 00:24:12.710
So...
00:24:13.200 --> 00:24:15.396
we should probably talk about...
00:24:16.600 --> 00:24:17.600
last night.
00:24:18.320 --> 00:24:19.320
Uh-huh.
00:24:19.640 --> 00:24:21.040
And what happened...
00:24:23.600 --> 00:24:25.114
It was one for the books, Nikki.
00:24:26.240 --> 00:24:27.071
Oh, my God.
00:24:27.160 --> 00:24:28.496
Yeah, you were saying that
a lot last night.
00:24:28.520 --> 00:24:30.080
No, no, no, no, no. Oh, my God. No. No.
00:24:30.160 --> 00:24:32.216
I'm gonna be in so much trouble.
My dad is gonna kill me.
00:24:32.240 --> 00:24:34.755
- I mean, I...
- Yeah, I think he's gonna shoot me first.
00:24:34.840 --> 00:24:37.150
I slept with Vince's son!
00:24:38.000 --> 00:24:39.912
I'm... I'm joining a convent.
00:24:40.320 --> 00:24:42.232
After last night,
they're not gonna let you in.
00:24:43.440 --> 00:24:45.033
Oh, my God!
00:24:46.440 --> 00:24:48.875
Relax. Hey, relax, stupida.
00:24:49.960 --> 00:24:51.360
- Nothing happened.
- Nothing?
00:24:51.880 --> 00:24:53.314
Nah, you passed out.
00:24:53.400 --> 00:24:55.016
- Oh, my God! Thank you!
- I gave you my room to sleep it off
00:24:55.040 --> 00:24:56.554
and I took the couch.
00:24:57.040 --> 00:24:59.032
Well, who took off my dress?
00:24:59.120 --> 00:25:01.874
Hey, listen, you had that on
when I left you.
00:25:01.960 --> 00:25:05.078
What you did with it after,
that's... none of my business.
00:25:12.200 --> 00:25:14.590
Uh, have you seen my necklace?
00:25:15.480 --> 00:25:16.480
You left it.
00:25:18.480 --> 00:25:19.480
On my lap.
00:25:20.240 --> 00:25:21.240
What?
00:25:22.080 --> 00:25:23.434
I... I don't wanna know.
00:25:24.880 --> 00:25:25.880
Thank you.
00:25:33.960 --> 00:25:35.792
- What?
- You're very, uh...
00:25:39.080 --> 00:25:41.072
How'd you get to be so very?
00:25:41.320 --> 00:25:42.320
Kale.
00:25:43.240 --> 00:25:44.674
Ever heard of it, pizza boy?
00:25:45.280 --> 00:25:47.112
Kale, kale, kale, kale. I...
00:25:47.560 --> 00:25:50.439
- Where's your bathroom?
- Sounds vaguely familiar.
00:25:50.520 --> 00:25:52.955
Let me think. Uh... it's a superfood.
00:25:53.040 --> 00:25:55.509
Part of the wild cabbage family.
00:25:55.600 --> 00:25:58.513
It's rich with antioxidants and calcium.
00:26:09.640 --> 00:26:12.599
So, look, my folks think
I'm arriving today.
00:26:12.920 --> 00:26:14.877
So, if I see you later...
00:26:20.680 --> 00:26:21.796
I'll look surprised.
00:26:33.880 --> 00:26:34.996
Can you believe this?
00:26:37.160 --> 00:26:38.674
More dough, Carlo!
00:26:38.760 --> 00:26:42.037
It's about time
we got some life back in this place!
00:26:42.800 --> 00:26:45.031
- Like old times.
- Okay, ladies!
00:26:46.400 --> 00:26:49.040
Go, Jogi, go! Jai ho, Slumdog!
00:26:49.520 --> 00:26:51.989
How I regret giving you
that DVD for Christmas!
00:26:52.080 --> 00:26:54.470
Sausage and peppers, two large.
00:26:54.560 --> 00:26:56.313
Hey, that was my nickname in the army!
00:26:58.280 --> 00:26:59.316
Whoa, whoa.
00:27:00.000 --> 00:27:02.196
Hey.
00:27:03.280 --> 00:27:04.680
This place is really hopping!
00:27:05.400 --> 00:27:07.198
- No thanks to you.
- Oh, come on, Pa!
00:27:07.280 --> 00:27:09.112
It's a beautiful day. Enjoy it, would you?
00:27:09.480 --> 00:27:11.696
Hey, Jogi, you got that order ready
for the police department?
00:27:11.720 --> 00:27:13.473
- Like every Sunday.
- Good man.
00:27:14.320 --> 00:27:16.277
Oh, Leo!
00:27:17.080 --> 00:27:18.434
Guys, I'll be right with you.
00:27:18.920 --> 00:27:20.120
Here you go, folks.
00:27:20.200 --> 00:27:21.873
- Enjoy!
- Hey, hey!
00:27:22.360 --> 00:27:23.360
Amalia!
00:27:24.680 --> 00:27:25.557
- Hi.
- Hi.
00:27:25.640 --> 00:27:27.336
It looks like you've got
a good crowd today.
00:27:27.360 --> 00:27:28.635
Nah, I guess we got lucky.
00:27:28.880 --> 00:27:32.351
Between you and me,
our pizza today is delicious.
00:27:33.240 --> 00:27:35.835
Well, our side is so dead,
Sal and I could have sex on the table
00:27:35.920 --> 00:27:37.240
and no one would even notice.
00:27:37.840 --> 00:27:39.296
But you know what? None of that matters.
00:27:39.320 --> 00:27:41.277
- Why?
- My Nikki's comin' home today!
00:27:41.360 --> 00:27:42.360
- What?
- I know! I know!
00:27:42.440 --> 00:27:43.800
- That is fabulous!
- I'm so happy!
00:27:43.880 --> 00:27:45.840
Keep your pants on, would you?
00:27:45.920 --> 00:27:46.956
Come on, already!
00:27:48.600 --> 00:27:50.910
Now, we just have to find her
a husband so she'll stay.
00:27:51.000 --> 00:27:51.911
- Sure.
- Right?
00:27:52.000 --> 00:27:53.000
Oh!
00:27:54.040 --> 00:27:55.838
- Honey, let's go!
- What? I'm comin'.
00:27:57.640 --> 00:27:59.597
If their mid-life crises
don't kill them...
00:27:59.800 --> 00:28:01.560
- We will.
- All right.
00:28:02.360 --> 00:28:05.558
- How's your father-in-law?
- He's horny as a teenager on prom night.
00:28:05.640 --> 00:28:06.471
Your mother-in-law?
00:28:06.560 --> 00:28:08.358
Oh, prudish as a nun during lent.
00:28:09.560 --> 00:28:10.560
- Hey!
- Hey!
00:28:25.520 --> 00:28:27.352
- Hi.
- Nicoletta!
00:28:29.240 --> 00:28:30.594
La bella!
00:28:34.720 --> 00:28:36.951
And already dressed for my funeral!
00:28:37.040 --> 00:28:39.794
Nonna, you're not going anywhere.
Don't say that.
00:28:39.880 --> 00:28:42.236
My next address is a tombstone.
00:28:42.920 --> 00:28:45.640
- Oh! You still wear it.
- Yeah.
00:28:45.960 --> 00:28:47.758
Saint Antonio...
00:28:48.800 --> 00:28:50.712
patron saint of wayward children.
00:28:50.800 --> 00:28:52.598
I knew he'd bring you home!
00:28:52.960 --> 00:28:55.555
Oh, bella, bella, bella!
00:28:56.800 --> 00:28:57.950
Salvatore!
00:28:58.320 --> 00:29:00.437
- Nicoletta nella casa!
- Honey! Honey, she's home!
00:29:00.520 --> 00:29:02.591
Oh, my beautiful girl!
00:29:03.080 --> 00:29:05.800
Oh, look! Look, I hardly recognize you!
00:29:05.880 --> 00:29:07.917
Well, you would
if you learned to FaceTime.
00:29:08.000 --> 00:29:10.231
Hey, is that what the boys
show their cazzo on?
00:29:10.320 --> 00:29:11.640
- Hi, Mama.
- Hug me!
00:29:11.880 --> 00:29:15.271
My baby. My baby! Oh! You're so thin!
00:29:15.880 --> 00:29:17.416
- What happened to her ass?
- I don't know!
00:29:17.440 --> 00:29:20.040
- No one trusts a skinny cook, baby!
- She'll get you another one.
00:29:20.840 --> 00:29:21.896
- Eat, baby. Eat!
- Oh, yeah.
00:29:21.920 --> 00:29:23.296
- Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm okay.
- Just a little bite.
00:29:23.320 --> 00:29:24.616
- You just got home!
- A little bite! Little bite!
00:29:24.640 --> 00:29:26.656
You miss your father's pizza, don't you?
Come on. Get in there.
00:29:26.680 --> 00:29:29.000
- Just a little bite. Yes!
- Get in there. There's my girl!
00:29:29.440 --> 00:29:31.159
So... How's it taste?
00:29:33.080 --> 00:29:35.117
- Just like home.
- Oh, that's it!
00:29:35.200 --> 00:29:36.554
- That's wonderful!
- Come here.
00:29:37.240 --> 00:29:39.675
Oh, listen, I made a list
of all the single men
00:29:39.760 --> 00:29:42.229
still in the area, okay?
We'll go through it later.
00:29:42.320 --> 00:29:45.791
I am so sorry, Mario.
My little girl, she just came home!
00:29:45.880 --> 00:29:48.076
Congratulations, Sal. Welcome home, Nikki.
00:29:48.160 --> 00:29:49.160
Hi, Mr. Puzzo.
00:29:49.320 --> 00:29:51.437
Hey, Sal, you gotta fix
the electrical on this place.
00:29:51.560 --> 00:29:53.040
- I know.
- Vince told me to tell you.
00:29:53.840 --> 00:29:54.840
Vince?
00:29:55.280 --> 00:29:57.920
You spoke to that gelatinous mass?
00:29:58.000 --> 00:29:59.150
Here we go.
00:30:01.240 --> 00:30:02.240
Take it.
00:30:02.720 --> 00:30:03.720
To go.
00:30:04.120 --> 00:30:05.120
Get out!
00:30:05.320 --> 00:30:06.960
- Are you serious, Sal?
- Out!
00:30:09.200 --> 00:30:10.429
Disgrazia!
00:30:11.600 --> 00:30:12.670
Sal!
00:30:13.160 --> 00:30:14.160
What?
00:30:14.480 --> 00:30:15.630
He slept with the enemy.
00:30:15.720 --> 00:30:17.916
- Really?
- This is why their side is always crowded
00:30:18.000 --> 00:30:19.036
and ours is empty!
00:30:24.360 --> 00:30:27.034
- Che fanno, una festa?
- It does sound like a party.
00:30:27.360 --> 00:30:28.360
Really?
00:30:28.720 --> 00:30:30.234
Party indeed.
00:30:32.280 --> 00:30:33.600
What did you do?
00:30:33.920 --> 00:30:34.920
Nothing!
00:30:36.600 --> 00:30:38.671
I didn't do nothing as far as you know.
00:30:44.840 --> 00:30:46.399
Don't just stand there!
00:30:47.000 --> 00:30:48.354
I got pizza cookin'.
00:30:49.400 --> 00:30:50.516
Oh, fuck!
00:30:51.440 --> 00:30:53.113
Jogi, do something!
00:30:53.360 --> 00:30:54.430
I'm on it, Boss!
00:30:55.040 --> 00:30:56.872
Get down from there, madam!
00:30:59.040 --> 00:31:02.556
Take me on your magic carpet ride,
Aladdin.
00:31:02.640 --> 00:31:05.200
First, let me show you
my Indian rope trick.
00:31:05.280 --> 00:31:07.158
Oh, yeah, baby!
00:31:07.800 --> 00:31:10.110
Oh, madam, I must warn you,
00:31:10.200 --> 00:31:12.351
my rope is very knotty!
00:31:12.880 --> 00:31:14.075
Get it? Naughty!
00:31:17.800 --> 00:31:20.599
Oh, I want to make
cookies and cream babies with her!
00:31:21.680 --> 00:31:23.194
Jogi, what the hell are you doing?
00:31:23.640 --> 00:31:26.439
Customer service, boss!
00:31:27.920 --> 00:31:28.920
Pa?
00:31:28.960 --> 00:31:31.634
They call me
the maniac from Mumbai!
00:31:32.000 --> 00:31:34.560
- What'd you put in the pizza today?
- Dude.
00:31:35.200 --> 00:31:37.032
Always the same, the best.
00:31:43.400 --> 00:31:45.517
- That's not oregano.
- Huh?
00:31:48.160 --> 00:31:49.719
My vangina!
00:31:49.800 --> 00:31:51.792
Do you think the cops
liked their weed pizza?
00:31:52.120 --> 00:31:53.873
Jogi, Jogi, Jogi!
00:31:53.960 --> 00:31:56.839
Jogi's hotter than the pizza here, baby!
00:31:57.040 --> 00:31:59.555
We had no idea! This was sabotage.
00:31:59.640 --> 00:32:00.517
Sabotage!
00:32:00.600 --> 00:32:02.910
Yeah, right!
Spiking our pizzas with reefer.
00:32:03.160 --> 00:32:04.435
- Bye-bye!
- It was you, Sal!
00:32:04.520 --> 00:32:06.000
I'll get you for this, you strunz!
00:32:06.400 --> 00:32:09.074
Hey! Peddling ganja from the Ganges?
00:32:09.400 --> 00:32:10.834
What will your mummy say?
00:32:11.240 --> 00:32:13.436
I would insult your mother,
00:32:13.920 --> 00:32:15.991
but cows are sacred in India!
00:32:16.120 --> 00:32:19.079
Hey, you'll never be the man
that your mother is!
00:32:19.160 --> 00:32:20.992
Oh! Thou must go! Bye-bye!
00:32:21.080 --> 00:32:23.072
Look, Officer, this is all a big mistake.
00:32:23.160 --> 00:32:25.000
- This is all just...
- Hands against the wall.
00:32:25.040 --> 00:32:26.554
Shut up and spread 'em.
00:32:26.960 --> 00:32:29.350
I said spread 'em!
You need an invitation to the prom
00:32:29.440 --> 00:32:30.760
- to get cozy?
- Okay, okay, okay.
00:32:30.800 --> 00:32:32.473
Hey! Bring those down to the station.
00:32:32.560 --> 00:32:34.836
We're gonna eat them later. As evidence!
00:32:35.080 --> 00:32:36.753
Eyes on the wall, captain.
00:32:38.280 --> 00:32:39.953
Oh, my God. That is...
00:32:40.440 --> 00:32:42.591
You're carting guns, mister.
You didn't declare
00:32:42.680 --> 00:32:45.434
that you had two amazing man guns.
00:32:45.520 --> 00:32:46.776
- You hiding anything else?
- Listen...
00:32:46.800 --> 00:32:47.950
Oh, what have you got here?
00:32:48.040 --> 00:32:50.350
A six-pack? Oh, no, I'm sorry.
That's eight.
00:32:50.440 --> 00:32:52.671
- I'm gonna go south now, okay?
- Hey, now...
00:32:52.760 --> 00:32:54.056
- You packing heat here, mister?
- Hands off!
00:32:54.080 --> 00:32:56.197
My God! Were you breastfed?
00:32:56.280 --> 00:32:58.920
Is there anything in your pockets
that might be sharp or hard
00:32:59.000 --> 00:33:00.673
or pokey in any way?
00:33:00.760 --> 00:33:02.353
- What?
- Eyes on the wall!
00:33:02.920 --> 00:33:04.760
I'm gonna just check
to see if you...
00:33:05.120 --> 00:33:07.351
Oh, my God... if you smell
like pot or anything.
00:33:07.440 --> 00:33:09.591
Hey, all right, listen.
You're clean, buddy.
00:33:09.920 --> 00:33:10.920
You're clean.
00:33:11.040 --> 00:33:13.430
Or are you dirty? I don't know.
I don't know.
00:33:14.400 --> 00:33:16.073
But I've got my eyes on you.
00:33:18.440 --> 00:33:19.440
Let's go!
00:33:20.160 --> 00:33:21.355
Whoa!
00:33:21.800 --> 00:33:24.793
The issue of your loins did this!
00:33:29.440 --> 00:33:31.079
That's right, you heard her!
00:33:31.600 --> 00:33:32.600
Ma!
00:33:32.800 --> 00:33:34.154
Welcome home, Nikki.
00:33:34.840 --> 00:33:37.878
He deserved everything he got...
Again with hitting!
00:33:38.840 --> 00:33:42.151
Don't look at him, Nikki.
Okay, folks. Who's got the munchies?
00:33:42.520 --> 00:33:43.920
Right this way, please.
00:33:46.840 --> 00:33:48.957
All right, folks. The show's over, okay?
00:34:15.360 --> 00:34:20.196
Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned
in thought, in word and in deed.
00:34:21.440 --> 00:34:22.954
A triple threat.
00:34:25.160 --> 00:34:28.119
You tell me your sins,
and I'll tell you mine.
00:34:28.360 --> 00:34:31.114
Our sin is
we'll go to hell for meeting like this.
00:34:31.960 --> 00:34:34.111
And our sons! I think they're onto us!
00:34:34.200 --> 00:34:36.271
I love you when you get so passionate.
00:34:36.920 --> 00:34:39.355
You watch it! The church has eyes.
00:34:39.440 --> 00:34:41.875
- But not as beautiful as yours!
- No!
00:34:42.400 --> 00:34:45.438
Now, give me a taste
of that special sauce.
00:34:46.200 --> 00:34:48.635
- Jesus!
- No! Father Toscani.
00:34:50.040 --> 00:34:52.714
- Franca?
- Oh, Gesu! Perdonami!
00:34:52.960 --> 00:34:54.189
Perdonami!
00:34:55.880 --> 00:34:57.155
Forgive me, Father!
00:34:57.880 --> 00:34:59.519
Oh, we're so busted!
00:35:04.400 --> 00:35:05.400
Thank you.
00:35:22.960 --> 00:35:24.314
- Hi.
- Hi.
00:35:27.240 --> 00:35:28.310
Nice bag.
00:35:29.920 --> 00:35:30.920
Nice...
00:35:32.320 --> 00:35:34.039
- Ball.
- Oh.
00:35:43.200 --> 00:35:44.759
Hey, Lisa.
00:35:45.320 --> 00:35:46.320
Hey, baby.
00:35:47.080 --> 00:35:48.434
Oh, Nikki.
00:35:52.480 --> 00:35:54.720
Aren't you gonna introduce me
to your little friend here?
00:35:55.400 --> 00:35:56.550
Yeah, of course.
00:35:58.280 --> 00:35:59.430
Lisa, meet Nikki,
00:36:00.160 --> 00:36:01.992
my... my best friend
00:36:02.080 --> 00:36:03.799
since, you know, we were like...
00:36:05.040 --> 00:36:06.315
well, forever.
00:36:09.920 --> 00:36:12.913
Well, that's about as much chitchat
as I can handle for today.
00:36:13.600 --> 00:36:14.600
I need a drink.
00:36:15.920 --> 00:36:16.990
Don't keep me waiting.
00:36:18.160 --> 00:36:19.160
Bad timing?
00:36:19.280 --> 00:36:22.079
- I just... I just came by to say sorry...
- No, no...
00:36:22.200 --> 00:36:23.696
...about my dad
and the whole arrest thing.
00:36:23.720 --> 00:36:25.677
Come on. A misdemeanor for pot possession?
00:36:25.760 --> 00:36:28.753
Please. My dad had your dad
investigated for tax evasion.
00:36:29.400 --> 00:36:30.436
And the year before that,
00:36:30.520 --> 00:36:33.035
your dad tried to have
Jogi deported, so...
00:36:34.600 --> 00:36:37.638
When did all of this go
from crazy to bat-shit insane?
00:36:38.320 --> 00:36:39.320
You know what?
00:36:39.600 --> 00:36:42.274
We've never apologized
for their stupidity before, so,
00:36:42.720 --> 00:36:43.949
let's not start now, okay?
00:36:44.840 --> 00:36:46.399
You're right. Thanks.
00:36:46.960 --> 00:36:47.960
Leo...
00:36:50.720 --> 00:36:51.949
You know, I'd love to, uh,
00:36:52.640 --> 00:36:55.200
finish what we started
the other night but...
00:36:55.440 --> 00:36:57.557
Yeah, no, it's fine. I... I'm...
00:36:57.800 --> 00:37:00.599
I'm around, you know.
Plenty of time to fool around.
00:37:00.960 --> 00:37:03.336
I mean, you know what I mean,
just hang out or something.
00:37:03.360 --> 00:37:06.080
- Yeah, right, okay, well...
- Hello?
00:37:06.960 --> 00:37:07.996
Final boarding call?
00:37:08.640 --> 00:37:10.074
It's not what you...
00:37:10.920 --> 00:37:12.070
Hey, wait! Listen.
00:37:14.760 --> 00:37:16.319
You wanna have dinner tomorrow night?
00:37:17.080 --> 00:37:18.958
You wanna come here, like, around 8:00?
00:37:19.920 --> 00:37:20.920
I'll cook.
00:37:21.040 --> 00:37:22.952
Really? I mean yeah, sure.
00:37:23.440 --> 00:37:24.760
Best friends gotta eat, right?
00:37:25.760 --> 00:37:26.760
Cool.
00:37:27.400 --> 00:37:28.754
Oh, okay.
00:37:28.840 --> 00:37:29.840
- Okay.
- Sorry.
00:37:33.040 --> 00:37:34.040
Bye!
00:37:34.760 --> 00:37:35.760
See ya!
00:37:40.560 --> 00:37:42.677
Vince Campoli
from Vince's "The Best" Pizza
00:37:42.760 --> 00:37:45.434
hit a new low
by getting his customers high.
00:37:46.560 --> 00:37:48.358
All right! Andiamo! Okay.
00:37:48.440 --> 00:37:52.229
Remember, the first one
to stand up is the loser.
00:37:52.480 --> 00:37:55.598
All bets must be placed
before the fight is entered.
00:37:55.680 --> 00:37:58.115
I got ten bucks on Sal!
He's an A-hole! Who's in?
00:37:58.200 --> 00:37:59.400
Hey, I'll take that bet!
00:38:03.160 --> 00:38:04.196
Okay, they're coming!
00:38:04.600 --> 00:38:06.432
Everyone step back. Step back.
Give them room.
00:38:09.280 --> 00:38:11.431
...but this does not bode well
for the Campolis.
00:38:11.520 --> 00:38:14.115
- Buonasera, Luigi!
- Hey, hey!
00:38:16.040 --> 00:38:17.599
These are dark days.
00:38:18.560 --> 00:38:20.438
Drugs, arrests.
00:38:20.720 --> 00:38:21.870
It's an infamia!
00:38:22.560 --> 00:38:24.791
You know, this used to be
a nice place to live.
00:38:25.360 --> 00:38:28.671
Now, the riffraff is here. No good.
00:38:29.080 --> 00:38:31.754
- How you doin' tonight, Vince?
- Not bad.
00:38:31.840 --> 00:38:35.390
Some imbecille tried to smoke me
out of business yesterday.
00:38:35.680 --> 00:38:38.120
- You get charged for that?
- A night in jail.
00:38:38.320 --> 00:38:41.518
Frankly, I took a rest,
because even with a $1,000 fine,
00:38:41.960 --> 00:38:43.917
record sales.
00:38:44.320 --> 00:38:46.039
That's big talk for a jailbird.
00:38:46.560 --> 00:38:48.119
Must've got lucky in the shower.
00:38:49.320 --> 00:38:51.073
Come on, Vince! You gonna take that?
00:38:51.440 --> 00:38:52.440
Sal...
00:38:52.760 --> 00:38:54.911
what's it like having Nikki home, huh?
00:38:55.120 --> 00:38:56.156
It's the best.
00:38:56.680 --> 00:38:58.034
My gioia mia is home!
00:38:58.280 --> 00:38:59.919
- Salut!
- Salut.
00:39:00.000 --> 00:39:02.720
Luigi, isn't that true
that usually the daughter
00:39:02.800 --> 00:39:04.837
takes after the mother? Thank God.
00:39:04.920 --> 00:39:07.040
And the son takes after the father.
00:39:07.320 --> 00:39:10.279
So soon, Leo will not be able
to see his feet.
00:39:13.520 --> 00:39:15.318
My Nikki is the complete package.
00:39:15.400 --> 00:39:18.234
She's beautiful, she cooks, and smart.
00:39:18.560 --> 00:39:20.995
She's got it up here
and knows how to use it.
00:39:21.080 --> 00:39:23.311
Unlike some children
that only know how to use
00:39:23.400 --> 00:39:25.153
what's down there.
00:39:25.480 --> 00:39:28.632
The small man wishes he had
half the action that my Leo does.
00:39:29.160 --> 00:39:30.896
All right, Pa. Just leave me
out of this, would you?
00:39:30.920 --> 00:39:33.389
Viagra wanted to take
a sample of his blood!
00:39:35.000 --> 00:39:35.831
Luigi...
00:39:35.920 --> 00:39:39.152
does his asshole get jealous
of the shit coming out of his mouth?
00:39:41.160 --> 00:39:45.154
How is it possible that a mere beast
with no brains and no looks
00:39:45.240 --> 00:39:48.870
could actually be the genetic father
of a complete package?
00:39:48.960 --> 00:39:52.192
Luigi, is this bewildered sloth
00:39:52.280 --> 00:39:53.999
questioning my fatherhood?
00:39:54.120 --> 00:39:56.237
Luigi, it's not
his fatherhood in question,
00:39:56.480 --> 00:39:57.880
but his manhood.
00:39:57.960 --> 00:39:59.314
- Bastardo!
- Disgrazia!
00:39:59.400 --> 00:40:01.357
On the house. It's a tie!
00:40:19.680 --> 00:40:22.195
You couldn't pick a place
where we stuck out less?
00:40:22.280 --> 00:40:26.115
We're the only ones without a computer
and the, how you say, the fancy phone!
00:40:26.200 --> 00:40:28.920
Exactly. Now that Father Toscani
00:40:29.480 --> 00:40:30.596
is onto us,
00:40:31.160 --> 00:40:32.913
the church is out.
00:40:33.840 --> 00:40:34.956
I feel terrible.
00:40:36.440 --> 00:40:37.556
Sneaking around,
00:40:38.200 --> 00:40:39.793
just waiting to be caught!
00:40:39.880 --> 00:40:41.599
Franca and Carlo?
00:40:42.000 --> 00:40:43.275
Two caramel lattes?
00:40:43.360 --> 00:40:44.720
- I've got 'em!
- Franca and... Oh!
00:40:46.720 --> 00:40:48.440
Is this for you, sir?
Here you are.
00:40:48.800 --> 00:40:50.075
Love your hat, by the way.
00:40:50.360 --> 00:40:52.158
You told them our names?
00:40:54.040 --> 00:40:55.554
What are we, spies?
00:40:56.000 --> 00:40:57.116
Relax!
00:40:57.200 --> 00:40:58.475
Drink.
00:41:03.280 --> 00:41:05.431
- Baby Jesus.
- Oh, mother of God!
00:41:05.640 --> 00:41:07.950
- Hold me!
- Oh, this is to die for!
00:41:08.040 --> 00:41:09.918
If I gotta go, this is the way to do it!
00:41:11.320 --> 00:41:14.233
- Two more, please!
- No, no! You dirty boy!
00:41:17.920 --> 00:41:18.920
Give me a kiss.
00:41:20.360 --> 00:41:22.477
- Give me a kiss. Come on.
- No. Stop. Stop it!
00:41:22.560 --> 00:41:25.394
- Amore mio...
- Watch it, Valentino.
00:41:25.720 --> 00:41:26.976
- Why?
- There's an old Italian saying
00:41:27.000 --> 00:41:28.736
- I learned from my nonna.
- And what's that?
00:41:28.760 --> 00:41:30.956
If you want it,
you have to put a ring on it.
00:41:31.600 --> 00:41:32.920
What was your grandmother's name?
00:41:33.360 --> 00:41:34.555
Beyoncé?
00:41:35.280 --> 00:41:36.600
No. Bianca.
00:41:37.400 --> 00:41:38.400
Oh.
00:41:41.440 --> 00:41:43.909
Nikki! How many
sausages did you want?
00:41:44.000 --> 00:41:45.559
I'm just gonna have the kale salad.
00:41:46.160 --> 00:41:47.799
That's gonna break your father's heart.
00:41:52.840 --> 00:41:55.160
Why are you so dressed up?
We're in your parents' backyard.
00:41:55.720 --> 00:41:56.836
Good point.
00:41:58.360 --> 00:42:00.920
You know Joe's a plumber now?
Fully certified.
00:42:01.360 --> 00:42:03.556
It's Joe's Plumbing. "Trust the best,
00:42:04.240 --> 00:42:06.118
flush the rest." Huh?
00:42:06.200 --> 00:42:07.554
- It's catchy.
- I know!
00:42:07.640 --> 00:42:08.915
Such an entrepreneur.
00:42:09.640 --> 00:42:11.359
Here, why don't you hold Joey Junior?
00:42:11.440 --> 00:42:13.160
- Oh, are you sure?
- Honey, I almost forgot
00:42:13.200 --> 00:42:15.476
- the nice cannolis.
- Thank you, baby.
00:42:16.280 --> 00:42:18.192
Oof. Here, take the gum.
00:42:18.560 --> 00:42:19.560
Leave the cannolis.
00:42:20.400 --> 00:42:22.119
Hi, Joey Junior!
00:42:23.240 --> 00:42:25.880
I can't believe you've had two kids
in the time I've been gone.
00:42:25.960 --> 00:42:28.600
I know.
It's like my uterus threw a party.
00:42:30.280 --> 00:42:31.280
So...
00:42:31.480 --> 00:42:32.550
the stewardess.
00:42:33.520 --> 00:42:35.876
She looked like she got off shift
at the perfume counter.
00:42:35.960 --> 00:42:38.600
- Puttana.
- And her bag, it was totally fake.
00:42:39.520 --> 00:42:40.840
But, uh...
00:42:40.920 --> 00:42:42.240
you're still gonna go for dinner?
00:42:42.640 --> 00:42:44.040
He wants to cook.
00:42:45.040 --> 00:42:46.040
Besides, if I don't go,
00:42:46.120 --> 00:42:48.430
he's gonna think he's had
some sort of effect on me.
00:42:48.720 --> 00:42:49.720
And he hasn't.
00:42:49.760 --> 00:42:51.194
So I should go
00:42:51.880 --> 00:42:52.880
to prove it.
00:42:54.120 --> 00:42:55.240
- Oh, it's okay!
- It's okay!
00:42:55.320 --> 00:42:56.959
- No, don't cry!
- I'm sorry.
00:42:57.240 --> 00:42:59.675
Come here. Come to Daddy.
Let the ladies talk.
00:42:59.760 --> 00:43:01.433
Thank you. Thank you. Please, continue.
00:43:02.080 --> 00:43:03.936
Look, it doesn't matter.
I am going back to London
00:43:03.960 --> 00:43:05.997
and when I am the chef de cuisine
00:43:06.080 --> 00:43:08.037
at Mayfair's newest
and trendiest restaurant,
00:43:08.120 --> 00:43:10.237
Leo is not even gonna be an afterthought.
00:43:12.440 --> 00:43:13.440
Wow.
00:43:14.080 --> 00:43:15.434
You're still in love with him.
00:43:16.480 --> 00:43:19.871
All those years of pent-up
sexual frustration.
00:43:20.080 --> 00:43:22.496
No wonder you're so skinny.
You must diddle yourself like a fiend.
00:43:22.520 --> 00:43:23.520
Would you stop?
00:43:23.600 --> 00:43:26.479
Look who's here!
00:43:27.280 --> 00:43:29.272
Look, it's Anthony Bottiluco!
00:43:29.360 --> 00:43:30.976
You remember Anthony, right? Look at him.
00:43:31.000 --> 00:43:33.674
- Look at him, all grown up! Hi!
- Hi.
00:43:34.360 --> 00:43:37.592
Nikki. Long time.
You look, uh, you look good.
00:43:37.880 --> 00:43:40.395
Oh, you're lookin'... you know, the same.
00:43:40.800 --> 00:43:42.439
- Thanks.
- Are you still at the, uh...
00:43:42.520 --> 00:43:45.433
Oh, at the parlor? Yeah.
Yeah, Pop's retired, so hey...
00:43:45.800 --> 00:43:48.190
I'm your guy if you need
any funeral arrangements.
00:43:48.680 --> 00:43:49.716
Good to know.
00:43:49.800 --> 00:43:52.110
Hey, speaking of which,
how's your nonna doing?
00:43:53.400 --> 00:43:55.596
- Mom, where is Nonna?
- Oh, she's at church.
00:43:55.680 --> 00:43:57.672
That lady prays more than the pope.
00:43:57.760 --> 00:43:58.776
Here you go.
00:43:58.800 --> 00:43:59.711
Salut.
00:43:59.800 --> 00:44:01.656
Just give me a minute
before he starts crying again.
00:44:01.680 --> 00:44:03.911
- Oh, hey, Gina.
- Yeah, I'm gonna let you two catch up.
00:44:04.000 --> 00:44:07.357
- No, oh, no. That's okay.
- Little Nikki, all grown up, hey.
00:44:07.440 --> 00:44:10.035
- Hi.
- Took the shoes off, huh?
00:44:10.720 --> 00:44:12.632
Lettin' the toes breathe.
00:44:14.000 --> 00:44:17.038
Look at that big toe. Very nice.
00:44:20.360 --> 00:44:22.795
- I have to pee.
- Ah, okay.
00:44:25.000 --> 00:44:26.639
Maybe he's changed a lot.
00:44:26.720 --> 00:44:27.720
- No!
- Oh, yeah.
00:44:30.720 --> 00:44:31.995
Oh, that's good.
00:44:38.720 --> 00:44:39.870
This is really good.
00:44:40.200 --> 00:44:41.759
Those are just the appetizers.
00:44:43.360 --> 00:44:44.360
Tonight's main course
00:44:44.440 --> 00:44:47.751
features my signature
ultra-thin crust pizza
00:44:48.440 --> 00:44:52.036
with mesquite mushrooms,
smoked gouda, a little prosciutto,
00:44:52.120 --> 00:44:54.715
and then we top it off
with radicchio and fresh arugula.
00:44:55.480 --> 00:44:56.480
So good.
00:44:59.320 --> 00:45:00.800
Have you considered...
00:45:01.920 --> 00:45:02.920
Figs?
00:45:04.720 --> 00:45:05.720
May I?
00:45:06.560 --> 00:45:07.560
Have at it.
00:45:08.880 --> 00:45:11.156
To cut through the gouda
and balance the flavors.
00:45:15.000 --> 00:45:16.559
You got some serious knife skills.
00:45:19.560 --> 00:45:22.598
My father would consider this
the highest form of treason.
00:45:23.440 --> 00:45:24.635
What's that, the pizza?
00:45:25.520 --> 00:45:26.715
Or us being together?
00:45:28.160 --> 00:45:29.160
Both.
00:45:30.280 --> 00:45:32.192
It looks pretty good.
00:45:33.440 --> 00:45:35.079
- Hot.
- Very.
00:45:35.960 --> 00:45:37.776
Seven hundred degrees.
It should only take about...
00:45:37.800 --> 00:45:38.995
About 90 seconds.
00:45:39.760 --> 00:45:40.760
Exactly.
00:45:42.600 --> 00:45:44.736
Why don't you do something
like this down at your pizzeria?
00:45:44.760 --> 00:45:46.752
I mean, you'd have lines down the block.
00:45:47.320 --> 00:45:49.391
My father, he, you know,
00:45:50.160 --> 00:45:53.710
he believes that pizza should be round
with sauce and mozzarella.
00:45:55.600 --> 00:45:56.600
And, you know,
00:45:57.080 --> 00:45:58.514
I cook what makes him happy.
00:46:02.160 --> 00:46:03.514
And what about you, Leo?
00:46:04.120 --> 00:46:05.315
What makes you happy?
00:46:09.120 --> 00:46:10.120
Family.
00:46:12.520 --> 00:46:13.795
Family's the most important.
00:46:23.120 --> 00:46:24.315
It's done.
00:46:25.640 --> 00:46:27.359
Whoa, whoa. Not yet, not yet. Hold on.
00:46:27.440 --> 00:46:29.200
It doesn't need your help, okay?
00:46:29.760 --> 00:46:32.195
- Patience.
- No. I'm telling you, it's done.
00:46:32.280 --> 00:46:34.397
Just give it another moment,
would you? Please?
00:46:35.640 --> 00:46:36.640
For me?
00:46:41.800 --> 00:46:43.120
A little bit of love.
00:46:46.040 --> 00:46:47.360
Now it's done.
00:46:53.720 --> 00:46:55.439
Come on. Please.
00:46:57.240 --> 00:46:58.515
My fresh arugula.
00:47:00.320 --> 00:47:01.320
Listen to this.
00:47:03.080 --> 00:47:04.480
The sound of perfection.
00:47:04.720 --> 00:47:05.836
You better believe it.
00:47:07.200 --> 00:47:08.953
- For you.
- Thank you.
00:47:15.720 --> 00:47:18.030
- It's delicious.
- The figs, they just...
00:47:18.800 --> 00:47:20.696
They give it the perfect amount
of sweetness, you know?
00:47:20.720 --> 00:47:22.074
For the smoky, spicy side.
00:47:26.360 --> 00:47:27.396
I love your pizza.
00:47:28.560 --> 00:47:29.560
Our pizza.
00:47:44.640 --> 00:47:48.111
Oh, dio! You scared me to death!
00:47:48.520 --> 00:47:51.240
What's going on? What are you doing here?
00:47:52.200 --> 00:47:53.919
Not in front of the Madonna!
00:47:54.320 --> 00:47:55.993
- It's a bad omen!
- No. It's bad luck
00:47:56.080 --> 00:47:57.639
to be superstitious.
00:48:00.480 --> 00:48:01.480
Franca.
00:48:05.400 --> 00:48:07.869
With the Virgin Mary as my witness,
00:48:08.160 --> 00:48:09.160
will you marry me?
00:48:32.800 --> 00:48:33.800
Women.
00:48:35.520 --> 00:48:36.954
Not you, of course, Maria.
00:48:45.640 --> 00:48:47.916
Leo, this is amazing!
00:48:48.640 --> 00:48:50.871
I grow all my fresh ingredients up here.
00:48:53.720 --> 00:48:56.110
Basil, oregano, some fennel.
00:48:57.040 --> 00:48:58.599
You name it. And it's all organic.
00:48:59.240 --> 00:49:00.913
Now you're speaking my language.
00:49:01.720 --> 00:49:04.360
You know, one day, I hope
something like this could be my legacy.
00:49:05.600 --> 00:49:09.276
Like a pizza shop on the bottom,
organic garden on top.
00:49:10.040 --> 00:49:11.520
I'll call it Pizza Organica.
00:49:12.600 --> 00:49:13.600
I love it.
00:49:14.080 --> 00:49:17.312
- Have you leased a space?
- No, but I got my eye on a spot.
00:49:17.840 --> 00:49:18.990
Still saving up, though.
00:49:20.320 --> 00:49:22.118
Maybe when my dad retires, right?
00:49:22.520 --> 00:49:25.240
Leo, why would you wait?
That could be in 20 years!
00:49:26.280 --> 00:49:28.920
What do you want me to do?
Compete with him?
00:49:33.280 --> 00:49:35.016
How is it that I'm the one
in culinary school,
00:49:35.040 --> 00:49:37.430
and yet you're the one
coming up with the dishes?
00:49:40.480 --> 00:49:43.040
I love this festival. Didn't you miss it?
00:49:44.120 --> 00:49:46.157
Our parents' hate-iversary.
00:49:47.040 --> 00:49:51.000
I don't understand how you start a fight
after winning a contest together.
00:49:51.400 --> 00:49:53.312
I mean, for making something
that you love.
00:49:54.160 --> 00:49:56.231
I don't think they even
remember what it was about.
00:50:00.320 --> 00:50:01.470
Listen.
00:50:02.920 --> 00:50:03.797
Come on.
00:50:03.880 --> 00:50:05.599
- Why?
- Come here.
00:50:06.760 --> 00:50:07.796
You remember?
00:50:08.320 --> 00:50:11.472
- Remember what?
- The tarantella, stupida.
00:50:11.840 --> 00:50:13.513
Settle down, stupido.
00:50:13.840 --> 00:50:15.991
I got it all locked in here.
00:50:29.240 --> 00:50:31.391
You know, the last time
we danced together was...
00:50:32.480 --> 00:50:33.480
at Gina's wedding.
00:50:34.880 --> 00:50:36.840
- You kissed me.
- Wait, you kissed me!
00:50:36.880 --> 00:50:38.678
I don't know. No, I think you started it.
00:50:40.440 --> 00:50:42.875
I'm pretty sure I was drunk.
That's what I remember.
00:50:42.960 --> 00:50:44.030
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
00:50:45.080 --> 00:50:47.754
That was the last time I saw you
before you took off for London.
00:50:49.200 --> 00:50:50.759
I couldn't believe that you'd just
00:50:51.280 --> 00:50:52.760
left without saying bye.
00:50:54.320 --> 00:50:55.800
Have you been lonely?
00:50:58.280 --> 00:51:00.272
Okay, fine. Who's...
00:51:01.600 --> 00:51:03.319
the investment banker?
00:51:03.400 --> 00:51:05.676
- You've been keeping tabs on me?
- Maybe a little bit.
00:51:06.920 --> 00:51:09.230
I might have checked out
your Facebook page a few times.
00:51:10.600 --> 00:51:12.637
You look ridiculous
in that chef's hat, by the way.
00:51:12.920 --> 00:51:15.071
You look ridiculous
in your hair net.
00:51:16.000 --> 00:51:18.037
- I don't wear one.
- Well, you're supposed to.
00:51:18.760 --> 00:51:19.760
Is that so?
00:51:33.600 --> 00:51:34.600
I should go.
00:51:36.000 --> 00:51:37.000
Why?
00:51:39.440 --> 00:51:40.556
So I don't stay.
00:52:02.760 --> 00:52:04.216
I'll take that.
00:52:04.240 --> 00:52:05.240
Thanks, Jessie.
00:52:08.760 --> 00:52:11.136
"You squeeze the love
out of every tomato
00:52:11.160 --> 00:52:12.230
as if it were the last."
00:52:14.520 --> 00:52:15.680
Nonna, what's wrong?
00:52:17.080 --> 00:52:18.958
I've been thinking about your nonno.
00:52:19.800 --> 00:52:20.800
Missing him?
00:52:22.200 --> 00:52:23.316
What was he like?
00:52:25.200 --> 00:52:27.954
The biggest ladies' man in all of Napoli.
00:52:28.480 --> 00:52:30.676
The charm of ten Italian men.
00:52:31.560 --> 00:52:32.835
What made him settle down?
00:52:34.080 --> 00:52:36.720
I hit him over the head
with a piece of prosciutto.
00:52:37.120 --> 00:52:38.520
Out of love, of course.
00:52:40.760 --> 00:52:42.114
Have you ever been in love?
00:52:43.240 --> 00:52:44.879
Maybe.
00:52:48.720 --> 00:52:50.200
You take over, bella.
00:52:50.920 --> 00:52:51.920
Okay.
00:52:52.120 --> 00:52:53.839
You tell your papa that...
00:52:56.000 --> 00:52:57.150
I went out.
00:52:58.040 --> 00:52:59.040
Okay.
00:53:10.720 --> 00:53:11.995
Figs?
00:53:12.480 --> 00:53:14.278
Your father sees this,
00:53:14.360 --> 00:53:16.591
he's gonna blow a gasket.
00:53:20.360 --> 00:53:21.794
How was your date last night?
00:53:25.480 --> 00:53:26.800
How'd you know that I, uh...
00:53:28.160 --> 00:53:29.160
Little Italy...
00:53:29.920 --> 00:53:31.195
It's little.
00:53:31.520 --> 00:53:33.159
Look, it wasn't a date, but...
00:53:34.320 --> 00:53:35.356
it was nice.
00:53:35.800 --> 00:53:36.800
Meaning?
00:53:38.520 --> 00:53:40.591
Nice, you know. It was... it was...
00:53:42.560 --> 00:53:44.119
It was very nice.
00:53:44.880 --> 00:53:47.759
But I don't know, Nonno.
It's... it's complicated with Nikki.
00:53:48.920 --> 00:53:51.958
Leo, here's what I learned about
00:53:52.760 --> 00:53:55.594
love, life and cooking.
00:53:57.040 --> 00:53:58.520
Learn from your mistakes.
00:53:59.280 --> 00:54:00.714
Be fearless.
00:54:01.920 --> 00:54:02.956
But above all,
00:54:05.000 --> 00:54:06.150
have fun.
00:54:11.920 --> 00:54:14.276
I don't know. I think maybe
she's outgrown this place.
00:54:15.880 --> 00:54:16.880
Leo...
00:54:17.480 --> 00:54:19.995
you can take the girl out of Little Italy,
00:54:20.080 --> 00:54:22.754
but you can't take Little Italy
out of the girl.
00:54:23.560 --> 00:54:24.994
Show her what she's missing.
00:54:27.400 --> 00:54:28.920
Thanks, Nonno.
00:54:29.200 --> 00:54:31.556
- I'm getting a cup of coffee.
- What the hell is this?
00:54:33.600 --> 00:54:34.600
What is that?
00:54:35.160 --> 00:54:36.719
Delicious is what it is.
00:54:37.640 --> 00:54:40.155
Give it a try, Pa. All right?
I'm gonna get out of here.
00:54:40.240 --> 00:54:43.870
- Oh, my buono! Oh, my God!
- Sweet and smoky at the same time!
00:54:44.200 --> 00:54:46.317
- Delicious!
- This is fantastic!
00:54:46.840 --> 00:54:49.309
Figs on a pizza! Who knew?
00:54:49.400 --> 00:54:50.914
- Oh, so good!
- Oh!
00:55:02.560 --> 00:55:04.472
Another caramel latte for Madonna.
00:55:04.760 --> 00:55:06.696
- Keep them coming.
- You got it, "Material Girl."
00:55:06.720 --> 00:55:09.280
- Hey, hey! That's enough!
- Hey, hey! Why did you do that?
00:55:10.400 --> 00:55:11.595
Come here. Give me that face.
00:55:11.960 --> 00:55:13.155
For your own good.
00:55:14.320 --> 00:55:16.437
What do you want from me, Carlo?
00:55:17.520 --> 00:55:19.477
Well, the other day,
you said if I wanted it,
00:55:19.560 --> 00:55:20.835
I had to put a ring on it.
00:55:21.200 --> 00:55:22.200
And I did,
00:55:22.920 --> 00:55:25.833
in front of the Virgin Mary,
no less, and you...
00:55:26.080 --> 00:55:27.080
you fled.
00:55:27.760 --> 00:55:28.955
What is it, my love?
00:55:30.200 --> 00:55:31.759
It's too hard, Carlo.
00:55:32.920 --> 00:55:34.593
After Alvaro died,
00:55:35.680 --> 00:55:38.718
I swore I would never
mourn another man in my life.
00:55:39.200 --> 00:55:40.873
Well, we could have, uh...
00:55:41.240 --> 00:55:42.469
what do they say, uh...
00:55:43.520 --> 00:55:44.556
friendly benefits?
00:55:47.560 --> 00:55:50.553
You almost sent my dentures
flying across the room!
00:55:50.640 --> 00:55:51.994
I am a lady!
00:55:53.560 --> 00:55:54.880
Yes, and...
00:55:56.040 --> 00:55:57.793
I want you to be my lady.
00:55:58.520 --> 00:56:01.194
You don't think that Alvaro
wants you to be happy?
00:56:01.680 --> 00:56:05.276
The only regrets we'll ever have
are the chances we didn't take,
00:56:06.120 --> 00:56:07.156
and the love
00:56:07.880 --> 00:56:09.200
we didn't make.
00:56:10.440 --> 00:56:11.794
I don't wanna hide no more,
00:56:12.360 --> 00:56:15.671
and go back to my stupid son's house alone
00:56:16.240 --> 00:56:17.240
at night.
00:56:17.440 --> 00:56:21.195
I want us to have a home together.
00:56:21.680 --> 00:56:24.798
A place to cuddle and watch
00:56:25.280 --> 00:56:26.280
The Bachelor
00:56:27.520 --> 00:56:28.715
in bed.
00:56:30.960 --> 00:56:32.360
I love you, Franca.
00:56:38.240 --> 00:56:40.550
I never thought I'd hear that again.
00:56:44.160 --> 00:56:46.595
I love you too, Carlo.
00:56:47.440 --> 00:56:48.440
Franca...
00:56:49.440 --> 00:56:50.476
with God...
00:56:52.200 --> 00:56:55.272
and this beardo-weirdo as my witness,
00:56:55.640 --> 00:56:56.835
I promise
00:56:57.520 --> 00:57:00.672
I will love you for as long as you live.
00:57:03.080 --> 00:57:04.080
Come on.
00:57:04.440 --> 00:57:05.440
Smile,
00:57:05.800 --> 00:57:07.200
while you still have your teeth.
00:57:09.880 --> 00:57:10.916
Yes.
00:57:12.920 --> 00:57:14.274
I will marry you.
00:57:17.840 --> 00:57:19.479
Look at that! Whoa!
00:57:48.920 --> 00:57:49.920
Hey!
00:57:52.040 --> 00:57:54.714
- What are you doing?
- Special delivery.
00:57:54.800 --> 00:57:56.553
Pizza for the lady.
00:57:56.920 --> 00:57:58.240
Kale included.
00:57:58.680 --> 00:57:59.750
I'm not hungry.
00:58:00.520 --> 00:58:03.035
What are you talking about?
You're always hungry at midnight.
00:58:05.000 --> 00:58:06.992
Hey, do me a favor, would you?
00:58:07.720 --> 00:58:09.552
Be ready first thing in the morning, okay?
00:58:10.160 --> 00:58:12.516
- Ready for what?
- Just be ready!
00:58:13.240 --> 00:58:15.709
Nikki! It tastes better than it looks!
00:58:55.920 --> 00:58:57.274
- Hey.
- Hi.
00:58:57.880 --> 00:58:59.155
Where are you taking me?
00:58:59.880 --> 00:59:01.280
I want to introduce you to someone.
00:59:03.960 --> 00:59:04.960
Who?
00:59:06.160 --> 00:59:07.594
The Nikki I used to know.
00:59:20.280 --> 00:59:21.919
- Do you juggle?
- Opa!
00:59:28.280 --> 00:59:29.560
- I'll think about it.
- Come on.
00:59:30.400 --> 00:59:31.936
- Yeah, you want a lick?
- Yeah. Hit me.
00:59:41.200 --> 00:59:42.554
- Good. Like it?
- Yeah.
00:59:42.960 --> 00:59:44.519
I like it. It's good.
00:59:45.320 --> 00:59:47.630
"Save a stallion, ride an Italian."
00:59:48.120 --> 00:59:50.336
Oh, there you go.
Oh! I think that you should get that one.
00:59:50.360 --> 00:59:51.920
We'll take both of these.
00:59:57.320 --> 00:59:59.160
I think I'd like to get
olive oil or something.
00:59:59.880 --> 01:00:01.599
- Wine?
- Yeah, sure. Wine.
01:00:01.680 --> 01:00:04.354
Can I get some of that cheese?
Yeah? Thank you.
01:00:04.640 --> 01:00:05.640
Who is this for?
01:00:06.840 --> 01:00:08.752
Don't worry. It's an old friend of ours.
01:00:26.440 --> 01:00:27.760
- No!
- Just do it!
01:00:27.840 --> 01:00:29.559
Come on! It's tradition.
01:00:30.320 --> 01:00:31.320
Yes!
01:00:32.040 --> 01:00:33.633
Come on, come on, come on, come on!
01:00:35.040 --> 01:00:36.918
Let's go!
01:00:43.360 --> 01:00:44.360
You again!
01:00:44.840 --> 01:00:46.576
- You're welcome, Mr. Ganucci!
- Bye!
01:00:46.600 --> 01:00:48.557
I'm still gonna
feed you to the worms!
01:00:56.760 --> 01:00:59.229
- Right there. Remember?
- You are not serious. Stop!
01:01:03.400 --> 01:01:06.120
- Ah! Come on!
- You wanna go again? Okay!
01:01:06.880 --> 01:01:07.757
Stop!
01:01:11.120 --> 01:01:13.555
That was freezing! I got towels in here.
01:01:23.080 --> 01:01:24.230
Ever the gentleman.
01:01:24.600 --> 01:01:27.593
Yeah, it's, uh...
It's getting harder by the minute.
01:01:27.680 --> 01:01:29.956
I didn't mean it like that.
01:01:30.080 --> 01:01:31.355
Okay? Enough.
01:01:54.640 --> 01:01:55.960
Do you wanna play a game?
01:01:59.960 --> 01:02:00.960
What are you thinking?
01:02:02.800 --> 01:02:05.679
Maybe something
where you can score for a change?
01:02:30.480 --> 01:02:32.153
Stop. Stop, stop, stop. Stop.
01:02:34.360 --> 01:02:36.636
First admit that you never let me win.
01:02:39.720 --> 01:02:40.790
Look, I...
01:02:41.440 --> 01:02:43.033
I got a reputation to maintain, okay?
01:02:43.120 --> 01:02:45.351
- I can't tell those sorts of lies.
- Say it.
01:02:45.440 --> 01:02:47.272
- What?
- Say it!
01:02:48.520 --> 01:02:49.520
Never.
01:03:10.320 --> 01:03:12.312
This room is so beautiful.
01:03:12.600 --> 01:03:13.750
Did you see, uh...
01:03:15.200 --> 01:03:16.714
the little soaps
01:03:17.360 --> 01:03:18.680
in the fancy bathroom?
01:03:18.920 --> 01:03:22.231
Already in my purse
with the shower caps and the Q-tips.
01:03:25.000 --> 01:03:26.000
And, uh...
01:03:27.400 --> 01:03:28.516
how was, uh...
01:03:28.800 --> 01:03:30.029
Incredibile!
01:03:31.080 --> 01:03:33.515
It's good everything still works, huh?
01:03:37.040 --> 01:03:39.271
How are we gonna tell the families?
01:03:40.640 --> 01:03:42.996
They're gonna freak out, as the kids say.
01:03:43.680 --> 01:03:45.911
I don't care.
01:03:47.280 --> 01:03:50.990
- And I'm looking forward to it.
- Oh!
01:03:55.240 --> 01:03:56.913
Carlo! Carlo!
01:04:00.520 --> 01:04:03.354
- Again? Oh!
- Or die trying.
01:04:03.760 --> 01:04:05.911
Oh! Oh! Animale!
01:04:09.280 --> 01:04:11.715
Maybe this time
you take off your top, huh?
01:04:12.760 --> 01:04:14.672
There you go!
01:04:41.120 --> 01:04:42.349
"Vince's Pizza"?
01:04:42.880 --> 01:04:44.633
Oh, no. I refuse to hire anyone
01:04:44.720 --> 01:04:47.599
that traipses around
in a pedestrian pizza shop outfit.
01:04:47.680 --> 01:04:49.319
I'll burn it as soon as we hang up.
01:04:49.640 --> 01:04:51.472
Good. Now, here.
01:04:52.240 --> 01:04:56.029
Look, our new endeavor.
Isn't it absolutely fabulous?
01:04:57.080 --> 01:04:59.470
- It's stunning.
- Of course it is.
01:04:59.800 --> 01:05:01.553
It's only missing one little detail.
01:05:01.880 --> 01:05:03.109
A stunning menu.
01:05:03.400 --> 01:05:05.357
Gareth has sent me his.
When do I get yours?
01:05:05.440 --> 01:05:07.830
I'm... I'm close, Chef. I can feel it.
01:05:08.400 --> 01:05:10.392
Your hair looks like you've been shagging.
01:05:11.480 --> 01:05:13.915
Is there a penis more pressing
than my menu?
01:05:14.000 --> 01:05:16.356
No! No, no, no. No. I'm on it!
01:05:17.080 --> 01:05:19.549
I mean, not on that, but I'm on it. I'm...
01:05:19.800 --> 01:05:20.916
You know what I mean.
01:05:21.000 --> 01:05:22.696
Well, there's only one way
to the top, Nicole,
01:05:22.720 --> 01:05:24.040
and it's a solo trip.
01:05:24.920 --> 01:05:26.752
Now, listen, you have until Sunday.
01:05:26.840 --> 01:05:29.514
Otherwise, you can be the first
to congratulate Gareth.
01:05:29.600 --> 01:05:31.831
- Watch out, you wanker!
- Oh, sorry! Sorry!
01:05:32.040 --> 01:05:34.475
Do you not see I'm standing here?
01:05:42.480 --> 01:05:45.075
If that's not the hottest advertisement
in all of Little Italy,
01:05:45.680 --> 01:05:46.875
I don't know what is.
01:05:48.760 --> 01:05:49.760
How you doin'?
01:05:51.200 --> 01:05:52.200
Thank you.
01:05:54.360 --> 01:05:55.360
For what?
01:05:55.840 --> 01:05:57.240
Making me feel at home again.
01:05:58.360 --> 01:05:59.840
Making it all so special.
01:06:00.760 --> 01:06:02.672
Everything's more special
now that you're back.
01:06:03.800 --> 01:06:05.075
I mean that.
01:06:10.640 --> 01:06:12.836
- I'm sorry. I can't.
- What's the matter?
01:06:14.920 --> 01:06:15.956
What are we doing?
01:06:17.160 --> 01:06:18.799
I'm not... I'm not a kid anymore,
01:06:18.880 --> 01:06:20.712
and I know who I am to you.
01:06:21.560 --> 01:06:23.916
Okay? I mean, I was the girl
that beat you at soccer,
01:06:24.040 --> 01:06:26.475
and then I was the girl
who had that silly crush on you,
01:06:26.560 --> 01:06:27.710
- and now...
- Nikki.
01:06:27.800 --> 01:06:29.632
I'm a girl who's been in your bed.
01:06:30.600 --> 01:06:32.336
- Oh, no. No, no, no...
- I've worked too hard
01:06:32.360 --> 01:06:34.477
to come back to this, I mean, to
01:06:34.560 --> 01:06:36.950
slaving away in a pizza joint
for the rest of my life,
01:06:37.040 --> 01:06:39.350
and watching our families fighting,
01:06:39.440 --> 01:06:41.955
and watching you grow old
with somebody else.
01:06:43.400 --> 01:06:44.516
With who?
01:06:45.160 --> 01:06:46.753
I don't know. Pick a number.
01:06:47.000 --> 01:06:48.576
I'm sure one will come
knocking on the door
01:06:48.600 --> 01:06:49.716
the second that I leave.
01:06:55.240 --> 01:06:57.596
Look, I've... I've really enjoyed our
01:06:58.360 --> 01:07:00.352
tryst, I just...
01:07:01.960 --> 01:07:02.960
Tryst?
01:07:04.080 --> 01:07:05.080
Really?
01:07:06.600 --> 01:07:07.600
I have to go.
01:07:20.760 --> 01:07:21.760
How does it look?
01:07:22.440 --> 01:07:25.353
The only thing we've saved
for a rainy day is an umbrella.
01:07:25.440 --> 01:07:26.556
And it's broken.
01:07:26.640 --> 01:07:28.074
We can't lose this place, Mali.
01:07:28.160 --> 01:07:30.231
It's the only thing we got
to leave to our kid.
01:07:30.320 --> 01:07:32.437
Well, then, maybe
you should believe in Leo, huh?
01:07:32.680 --> 01:07:34.717
I mean, let him try it his way!
01:07:35.080 --> 01:07:38.790
Little Italy is changing, Vinny,
but that doesn't have to be bad.
01:07:39.600 --> 01:07:42.240
Hey guys, I'm gonna go for a walk.
Okay? I'll be back.
01:07:42.320 --> 01:07:44.676
I'm closing a little early tonight, Leo.
01:07:44.960 --> 01:07:46.030
- What?
- Why?
01:07:46.120 --> 01:07:48.077
Because I'm taking the family to dinner!
01:07:48.160 --> 01:07:49.230
- What?
- Why?
01:07:49.320 --> 01:07:50.640
Do I have to give a reason?
01:07:51.080 --> 01:07:52.958
Who raised you people?
01:07:53.400 --> 01:07:55.710
Dress nice. Be ready by 7:00.
01:07:55.840 --> 01:07:56.876
You, too, kid.
01:07:58.160 --> 01:08:00.197
Okay!
01:08:00.280 --> 01:08:02.317
- I hope he's paying.
- Oh, he's paying.
01:08:11.920 --> 01:08:13.195
Baby.
01:08:14.120 --> 01:08:15.896
You know, I have trained
with the world's finest,
01:08:15.920 --> 01:08:17.991
but nothing comes close to Nonna's sauce.
01:08:18.520 --> 01:08:21.558
It's like I can taste what's in it,
but I just can't put my finger on it.
01:08:21.640 --> 01:08:23.279
Yeah, well, good luck with that.
01:08:23.680 --> 01:08:25.160
She hasn't even told your father.
01:08:26.680 --> 01:08:28.353
We are so proud of you, Nikki.
01:08:28.880 --> 01:08:30.712
And so very happy that you are home.
01:08:31.720 --> 01:08:34.440
Have you ever thought about...
leaving here, Ma?
01:08:36.200 --> 01:08:37.200
Leaving? No.
01:08:37.720 --> 01:08:39.234
No, it never occurred to me.
01:08:40.120 --> 01:08:41.634
It's a big world out there.
01:08:41.760 --> 01:08:43.717
I know. I've been to Niagara Falls,
01:08:43.800 --> 01:08:45.473
thank you very much.
01:08:45.600 --> 01:08:46.600
Come on.
01:08:46.920 --> 01:08:49.355
I mean, how do you stay so happy?
01:08:49.680 --> 01:08:51.160
You guys are going broke here,
01:08:51.240 --> 01:08:53.516
you and Dad are fighting
all the time, and yet,
01:08:53.800 --> 01:08:55.871
you just seem as in love as ever.
01:08:56.200 --> 01:08:57.816
- Dora!
- You are killing me!
01:09:02.080 --> 01:09:03.799
Okay, you really wanna know?
01:09:04.680 --> 01:09:06.399
Not if it's about sex.
01:09:06.840 --> 01:09:11.119
Well, I mean, good sex
is a key ingredient but
01:09:11.880 --> 01:09:13.519
a good man
01:09:13.800 --> 01:09:16.395
is the meal you wanna eat every night.
01:09:18.200 --> 01:09:19.953
Still sounded sexual.
01:09:20.040 --> 01:09:22.350
- I'm sorry. Yeah, just a little.
- It's a little bit...
01:09:26.720 --> 01:09:28.074
Wha...
01:09:29.560 --> 01:09:31.040
- I love you.
- I love you.
01:09:34.120 --> 01:09:35.156
Sal, what?
01:09:35.760 --> 01:09:37.433
You messing with my sauce?
01:09:37.520 --> 01:09:39.079
You don't mess with perfection.
01:09:41.120 --> 01:09:43.510
- Anybody looking?
- No.
01:09:43.880 --> 01:09:44.880
What?
01:09:45.480 --> 01:09:46.596
My nonna
01:09:47.240 --> 01:09:51.553
would stir in two anchovies
just for long enough to salt the sauce.
01:09:52.800 --> 01:09:54.871
Don't tell nobody.
01:09:56.640 --> 01:09:57.915
Dance with me! Dance with me!
01:09:58.000 --> 01:09:59.992
All right. Everybody!
01:10:00.240 --> 01:10:02.550
Family dinner tonight. My treat.
01:10:02.840 --> 01:10:04.559
- Why?
- What's the occasion?
01:10:04.640 --> 01:10:07.235
I need a reason
to make dinner with my family?
01:10:07.320 --> 01:10:09.471
I'm gonna die soon,
and I like food. That's it.
01:10:09.600 --> 01:10:11.592
Dinner at 7:00. You, too, come.
01:10:20.160 --> 01:10:22.152
Welcome to Korma Sutra.
01:10:22.280 --> 01:10:23.919
I'm gonna get gas.
01:10:24.600 --> 01:10:25.954
The Lustful Lotus.
01:10:26.360 --> 01:10:27.510
Try it on the menu...
01:10:27.600 --> 01:10:28.750
and at home.
01:10:30.640 --> 01:10:33.519
Ma, this is the restaurant
you pick for a family dinner?
01:10:33.600 --> 01:10:35.751
- Yeah.
- It's an interesting choice, Nonna.
01:10:35.840 --> 01:10:36.910
How'd you find it?
01:10:37.280 --> 01:10:39.237
I, I did the Yelp.
01:10:39.640 --> 01:10:40.676
And besides,
01:10:41.120 --> 01:10:44.830
if your father make a scene,
no one we know will see.
01:10:44.920 --> 01:10:47.833
Ma, why would I make... What the hell!
01:10:48.560 --> 01:10:51.473
- What the hell!
- Hey, welcome! Welcome, everybody!
01:10:51.600 --> 01:10:53.796
- That's it. I'm leaving.
- You sit!
01:10:54.200 --> 01:10:55.634
I'd rather sit in hell!
01:11:02.600 --> 01:11:05.957
Now, Franca and I
have something to tell all of you.
01:11:07.720 --> 01:11:10.440
While our families have been at war,
01:11:10.520 --> 01:11:12.910
two people here have fallen in love.
01:11:14.080 --> 01:11:16.200
I swear to God, Vince,
if your slimy son
01:11:16.240 --> 01:11:18.456
- has touched my daughter...
- The only thing slimy here is you!
01:11:18.480 --> 01:11:19.800
Shut up, both of you!
01:11:22.960 --> 01:11:24.280
Carlo and I...
01:11:26.440 --> 01:11:28.875
We've been seeing each other.
01:11:29.160 --> 01:11:30.389
- Huh?
- What?
01:11:31.080 --> 01:11:33.197
What do you mean "seeing each other"?
01:11:34.200 --> 01:11:36.078
We've been having a relationship.
01:11:37.320 --> 01:11:40.313
What do you mean "having a relationship"?
01:11:40.440 --> 01:11:43.353
Forgive me, Salvatore. We've been lovers.
01:11:46.520 --> 01:11:48.079
Oh, okay.
01:11:48.480 --> 01:11:49.550
I don't understand.
01:11:49.800 --> 01:11:51.871
Do you want me to draw you a picture?
01:11:51.960 --> 01:11:54.316
Or you can pick
one of those from the menu.
01:11:54.400 --> 01:11:55.277
Oh, stop.
01:11:55.360 --> 01:11:57.056
Put that down.
01:11:57.080 --> 01:11:58.309
Oh! Oh!
01:11:58.600 --> 01:12:01.160
Just gonna need this knife, Ma.
I'm gonna open a vein.
01:12:01.240 --> 01:12:02.560
I can't feel my legs.
01:12:02.760 --> 01:12:05.320
- I think it's, it's wonderful!
- Oh!
01:12:05.640 --> 01:12:07.916
Now, if you two could just
start acting like grown-ups...
01:12:08.200 --> 01:12:10.510
Yeah, then maybe we can put an end to this
01:12:10.600 --> 01:12:12.193
whole stupid family war.
01:12:12.280 --> 01:12:13.496
This is your fault. Your fault!
01:12:13.520 --> 01:12:15.193
- You and your horny old man!
- Hey!
01:12:15.280 --> 01:12:17.256
You don't even know
where your own mother is at night!
01:12:17.280 --> 01:12:18.656
- Watch your mouth!
- That's it. You know what?
01:12:18.680 --> 01:12:21.479
Little Italy is not big enough
for me and you.
01:12:21.560 --> 01:12:22.976
You're right. So, when are you leaving?
01:12:23.000 --> 01:12:25.799
We're not leaving!
The Angioli pizza's always been superior.
01:12:25.880 --> 01:12:27.109
So do the community a favor.
01:12:27.200 --> 01:12:29.360
Pack up your fugazi pizza
and get the hell out of town!
01:12:29.440 --> 01:12:30.794
- Here we go.
- Again.
01:12:30.880 --> 01:12:33.315
You wouldn't know good pizza
if it bit you!
01:12:36.880 --> 01:12:39.236
Let's let Little Italy decide
who stays and who goes.
01:12:39.320 --> 01:12:41.391
What are you two idiots talking about?
01:12:42.160 --> 01:12:44.356
- The Little Italy pizza contest.
- Yeah.
01:12:45.400 --> 01:12:47.437
- And whoever loses goes.
- Vince!
01:12:47.520 --> 01:12:49.989
- They won't let you enter.
- Yeah. You're banned.
01:12:50.240 --> 01:12:52.391
Yeah, we're banned, but these two aren't.
01:12:52.720 --> 01:12:53.995
We can't compete.
01:12:54.280 --> 01:12:55.680
But Leo and Nikki can.
01:12:57.760 --> 01:12:58.816
What?
01:12:58.840 --> 01:13:01.594
No, no, no, no, no. No way.
All right? We're not competing.
01:13:01.680 --> 01:13:03.956
I'm a chef. I don't do pizza.
01:13:04.600 --> 01:13:06.990
That one hurt.
01:13:07.080 --> 01:13:08.992
- You did pizza the other night.
- Leo!
01:13:09.080 --> 01:13:10.912
- What night?
- There was some kind of night?
01:13:11.000 --> 01:13:12.376
- What do you do at night?
- Stop, okay?
01:13:12.400 --> 01:13:14.198
I'm not doing a pizza competition.
01:13:14.280 --> 01:13:15.999
I'd understand why you would chicken out,
01:13:16.120 --> 01:13:19.716
because really, she never
was able to compete at Leo's level.
01:13:19.800 --> 01:13:22.190
Wait. Whoa, whoa. whoa.
What do you mean "at Leo's level"?
01:13:22.280 --> 01:13:23.999
Soccer. He was better.
01:13:24.080 --> 01:13:25.560
What soccer? She always won!
01:13:26.040 --> 01:13:28.396
Look, they've been lifelong rivals,
01:13:28.640 --> 01:13:31.360
and she's afraid to go up against him.
01:13:31.440 --> 01:13:32.720
Pa, we're not rivals, all right?
01:13:32.760 --> 01:13:34.120
- We were just competitive.
- Yeah.
01:13:34.280 --> 01:13:35.475
If we were rivals,
01:13:35.560 --> 01:13:37.995
- I never would have let her win.
- Okay, let's be clear.
01:13:38.080 --> 01:13:40.311
Nobody ever let me win.
01:13:40.640 --> 01:13:43.280
- Are we gonna start with this again?
- You won when I let you.
01:13:45.200 --> 01:13:46.919
Yeah, like you let me win last night.
01:13:52.320 --> 01:13:53.834
Are we still talking about soccer?
01:14:01.200 --> 01:14:02.839
I'm really happy for you, Nonna.
01:14:06.760 --> 01:14:08.479
Listen, honey, you don't have to go.
01:14:08.560 --> 01:14:10.096
- Hey, wait. Nikki...
- No! You know what?
01:14:10.120 --> 01:14:11.998
I am done waiting, Leo.
01:14:13.000 --> 01:14:15.240
You know, there's a reason
why they call it Little Italy.
01:14:15.720 --> 01:14:17.313
because nothing ever changes here.
01:14:17.720 --> 01:14:20.679
I mean, not our fathers
and their stupid fight...
01:14:22.080 --> 01:14:23.400
and especially not you.
01:14:35.560 --> 01:14:36.994
Paesano, face it.
01:14:37.480 --> 01:14:39.949
You're in love with Nikki.
Always have been.
01:14:40.720 --> 01:14:43.001
But every time you come close
to doing something about it,
01:14:43.040 --> 01:14:44.440
you talk yourself out of it.
01:14:44.680 --> 01:14:47.991
"Oh, I can't be with Nikki.
She's moving to London."
01:14:48.280 --> 01:14:51.671
"Oh, I can't be with Nikki,
my dad will cut off my giggle berries."
01:14:51.760 --> 01:14:53.717
It's too complicated, all right?
You know...
01:14:54.680 --> 01:14:56.592
This is for the best. Trust me.
01:14:57.040 --> 01:14:58.536
Those sounds like the excuses of a man
01:14:58.560 --> 01:15:01.439
who's not being honest
with himself, huh? Che parli?
01:15:02.360 --> 01:15:04.795
Oh, I'm not being honest
with myself?
01:15:05.760 --> 01:15:08.559
Look, I'm not trying to be
mean or nothing, all right, but...
01:15:09.400 --> 01:15:11.232
Have you looked at yourself in the mirror?
01:15:12.480 --> 01:15:14.119
Luigi, your real name
01:15:14.560 --> 01:15:17.519
is Lee Zhao Ping. You're Chinese, bro!
01:15:17.760 --> 01:15:20.639
When are you gonna be honest with yourself
that you're not even Italian?
01:15:31.240 --> 01:15:34.438
You know, when I told my dad
I was gay, he...
01:15:36.040 --> 01:15:37.474
threw me out of the house.
01:15:42.720 --> 01:15:44.040
Will you still be my friend?
01:15:44.560 --> 01:15:45.630
Luigi.
01:15:46.240 --> 01:15:47.240
Come on!
01:15:48.080 --> 01:15:50.117
You think I wouldn't
be your friend just 'cause,
01:15:50.680 --> 01:15:52.512
what, you like guys? So what?
01:15:52.760 --> 01:15:53.760
No.
01:15:54.240 --> 01:15:55.754
Because I'm not Italian.
01:15:57.480 --> 01:15:59.437
You know, when my daddy threw me out,
01:15:59.720 --> 01:16:01.473
I walked the streets for days, you know?
01:16:02.360 --> 01:16:04.670
And I ended up here, pretty damn drunk.
01:16:05.280 --> 01:16:06.760
You know, the real Luigi?
01:16:07.600 --> 01:16:10.069
He took me in. He gave me a job.
01:16:10.480 --> 01:16:14.440
You know, I found a community
that's crazy, chaotic...
01:16:15.560 --> 01:16:16.560
but lovable.
01:16:18.200 --> 01:16:21.591
You know, when I was Lee Zhao Ping,
I was an outcast.
01:16:22.840 --> 01:16:24.240
When I became Luigi,
01:16:25.960 --> 01:16:27.314
everyone accepted me.
01:16:27.720 --> 01:16:29.871
Look, I'm sorry, man. I didn't know.
01:16:29.960 --> 01:16:31.553
- All right? I didn't know.
- Ah, stop.
01:16:34.560 --> 01:16:38.270
You can either go after Nikki
and open up your own shop,
01:16:39.040 --> 01:16:40.269
or hey, hey,
01:16:40.680 --> 01:16:42.114
you can move to Chinatown.
01:16:43.520 --> 01:16:45.796
- Yeah, sure.
- Mio amico,
01:16:45.880 --> 01:16:49.237
you and Nikki,
you're like Romeo and Juliet, huh?
01:16:49.520 --> 01:16:51.352
Romeo and Juliet died.
01:16:51.440 --> 01:16:53.079
That's a bad example.
01:16:53.160 --> 01:16:54.276
You, uh...
01:16:56.520 --> 01:16:58.273
You're like Rocky and Adrian.
01:16:58.640 --> 01:17:01.474
- I'm not Rocky.
- No! But you could be.
01:17:09.200 --> 01:17:12.159
- Is your hand on my ass?
- That's how Chinese people hug.
01:17:23.200 --> 01:17:24.919
I knew I'd find you here.
01:17:25.600 --> 01:17:26.875
Nonna knows.
01:17:32.280 --> 01:17:34.272
I remember your confirmation.
01:17:35.080 --> 01:17:36.560
You stood right there.
01:17:38.320 --> 01:17:41.154
It was a special day for two reasons.
01:17:41.760 --> 01:17:44.195
One, because you chose Saint Antonio,
01:17:44.920 --> 01:17:46.718
- and...
- I got my braces off.
01:17:46.800 --> 01:17:49.793
Look, there you are.
There's a smile, bellissima.
01:17:52.640 --> 01:17:53.640
Come.
01:17:53.920 --> 01:17:55.070
Come, bella.
01:17:58.080 --> 01:17:59.400
So, tell me...
01:18:02.120 --> 01:18:03.440
What's in London?
01:18:04.920 --> 01:18:05.920
A new job.
01:18:06.360 --> 01:18:07.360
A new life.
01:18:07.560 --> 01:18:08.710
No drama.
01:18:09.280 --> 01:18:11.840
And this life over there,
it makes you happy?
01:18:14.200 --> 01:18:15.600
Oh, come here.
01:18:16.360 --> 01:18:17.589
It's good to cry.
01:18:18.000 --> 01:18:19.116
Washes the soul.
01:18:23.520 --> 01:18:24.795
Do you love him?
01:18:26.280 --> 01:18:27.350
It doesn't matter.
01:18:28.760 --> 01:18:31.673
Maybe it's time
you take a piece of prosciutto
01:18:31.760 --> 01:18:33.558
and you whack him over the head.
01:18:36.120 --> 01:18:37.120
When I was little,
01:18:37.800 --> 01:18:40.952
you told me I should never have to
squeeze love out of a man's heart.
01:18:41.440 --> 01:18:43.432
That if it doesn't come freely,
I don't want it.
01:18:43.520 --> 01:18:44.520
I did?
01:18:44.880 --> 01:18:46.758
What else did I say?
01:18:47.360 --> 01:18:49.033
That boys are stupido
01:18:49.160 --> 01:18:51.516
and that I can do anything
better than they can.
01:18:51.600 --> 01:18:53.671
Ah! You see, I'm a wise woman.
01:18:55.480 --> 01:18:57.790
In here, what do you want?
01:19:01.080 --> 01:19:02.480
I want to be happy.
01:19:03.480 --> 01:19:05.039
I want you all to be happy.
01:19:06.360 --> 01:19:07.555
And I...
01:19:09.200 --> 01:19:10.475
I guess I do want...
01:19:10.760 --> 01:19:11.760
Leo.
01:19:12.960 --> 01:19:13.960
Yes.
01:19:15.080 --> 01:19:17.117
If you have to leave, you have to leave.
01:19:18.560 --> 01:19:21.553
But if this thing with Leo
is really love...
01:19:23.000 --> 01:19:24.639
it'll come and find you.
01:19:56.080 --> 01:19:57.400
You got something you wanna say?
01:20:02.120 --> 01:20:03.600
You got something you wanna say?
01:20:10.440 --> 01:20:11.476
You know what, Leo?
01:20:11.760 --> 01:20:12.760
The competition?
01:20:13.360 --> 01:20:14.360
It's on.
01:20:15.080 --> 01:20:16.833
Oh, so the chef wants to make pizza?
01:20:20.360 --> 01:20:22.431
Okay, fine. Yeah, it's on.
01:20:27.760 --> 01:20:28.760
Wow, really?
01:20:30.480 --> 01:20:31.675
All right, fine. It's on.
01:20:34.720 --> 01:20:36.856
Come on down, everyone.
01:20:36.880 --> 01:20:38.760
- Join the party!
- Have some fun!
01:20:39.880 --> 01:20:42.190
Today is Little Italy's biggest day.
01:20:42.280 --> 01:20:44.556
Today, we crown the winners of...
01:20:44.640 --> 01:20:47.109
Ah! Miss Little Italy Bikini.
01:20:47.520 --> 01:20:50.592
And of course, Little Italy's Mr. Bikini.
01:20:53.400 --> 01:20:55.517
Sorry.
01:20:55.600 --> 01:21:00.117
And of course, we also crown the winner
of Little Italy's Best Pizza!
01:21:00.200 --> 01:21:01.839
That's right!
01:21:02.440 --> 01:21:03.936
- Go get 'em, baby!
- Today's contest
01:21:03.960 --> 01:21:05.496
- has two stages.
- You better pack your bags!
01:21:05.520 --> 01:21:07.910
Elimination and championship.
01:21:08.000 --> 01:21:10.276
And only the top two
can move on to the finals.
01:21:10.560 --> 01:21:12.279
Round one.
01:21:12.360 --> 01:21:13.396
- Hey!
- Start the clock.
01:21:15.680 --> 01:21:19.435
Our contestants must wow us
with a pizza creation
01:21:19.560 --> 01:21:22.598
that looks and tastes original.
01:21:23.120 --> 01:21:24.839
- Yeah!
- Okay, folks!
01:21:24.920 --> 01:21:26.957
Now, let's give a big hand to these chefs.
01:21:44.200 --> 01:21:45.680
Ten, nine...
01:21:46.000 --> 01:21:47.480
Eight, seven,
01:21:47.840 --> 01:21:50.309
six, five, four,
01:21:50.880 --> 01:21:53.190
three, two, one!
01:21:58.320 --> 01:22:00.915
- Paesano, you got this!
- You got this, baby!
01:22:01.000 --> 01:22:03.469
Here he comes.
01:22:05.440 --> 01:22:07.033
This was not easy, folks.
01:22:07.120 --> 01:22:09.680
Yeah, each of these
pizzaiolos is a master.
01:22:10.160 --> 01:22:12.550
But Johnny, we can only choose two, huh?
01:22:12.800 --> 01:22:16.237
So, let's give a big round of applause
to our two finalists.
01:22:16.440 --> 01:22:18.616
Leo Campoli from Vince's "The Best."
01:22:18.640 --> 01:22:21.280
And Nikki Angioli
from Sal's "It's Better."
01:22:21.960 --> 01:22:24.350
There's something more
than just a trophy at stake.
01:22:24.440 --> 01:22:30.277
As we finally put an end
to Little Italy's oldest food fight.
01:22:31.200 --> 01:22:33.840
We are going to challenge our finalists
01:22:33.920 --> 01:22:36.754
- to cook the queen of all pizzas...
- Hey!
01:22:37.120 --> 01:22:39.032
La pizza Margherita!
01:22:39.120 --> 01:22:41.430
Okay!
01:22:41.560 --> 01:22:44.473
Each pizza will be judged by its crust,
01:22:44.800 --> 01:22:47.360
- its sauce...
- And above all...
01:22:48.160 --> 01:22:49.355
The taste.
01:22:50.000 --> 01:22:51.798
Stay focused, all right? It's all up here.
01:22:51.880 --> 01:22:52.996
"Eye of the Tiger."
01:22:53.080 --> 01:22:54.673
You could be "Champion of the world!"
01:22:54.760 --> 01:22:55.760
Pizzaiolos...
01:22:56.320 --> 01:22:58.471
It's go time!
01:23:02.560 --> 01:23:04.200
- Go, Nikki!
- All right, son!
01:23:04.640 --> 01:23:05.640
Hey.
01:23:06.360 --> 01:23:07.360
Good luck.
01:23:07.640 --> 01:23:08.640
You, too.
01:23:10.480 --> 01:23:11.630
Okay, folks.
01:23:12.120 --> 01:23:13.554
Beautiful dough, Leo!
01:23:14.040 --> 01:23:15.920
They're gonna be heading
over to the...
01:23:16.640 --> 01:23:19.633
Look how nice she rolls.
Look how nice she rolls that out.
01:23:20.440 --> 01:23:21.999
Yesterday at the church,
01:23:22.080 --> 01:23:24.549
I light not one candle, but two.
01:23:24.640 --> 01:23:25.640
Yeah, but darling...
01:23:26.080 --> 01:23:27.514
there can only be one winner.
01:23:28.120 --> 01:23:30.191
Leo!
01:23:30.280 --> 01:23:31.280
Come on, Leo!
01:23:33.880 --> 01:23:35.109
Hey, that's my boy!
01:23:35.200 --> 01:23:36.953
Come on! What do you want, style points?
01:23:46.160 --> 01:23:48.320
It's too bad
there's only going to be one winner.
01:23:53.440 --> 01:23:55.193
Look how beautiful this is!
01:23:57.280 --> 01:24:00.000
- Down in front! Move it over!
- Hi. Hey. That's good.
01:24:01.800 --> 01:24:02.800
Nice!
01:24:03.840 --> 01:24:05.672
Come on! Focus! Focus!
01:24:08.600 --> 01:24:10.600
- All right, it's the home stretch!
- Home stretch!
01:24:10.680 --> 01:24:12.360
While the pizzas are
cooking,
01:24:12.480 --> 01:24:14.915
why don't we do some cooking ourselves?
01:24:15.360 --> 01:24:20.389
Hey! Why don't we announce
the winner of this year's Miss Bikini?
01:24:27.320 --> 01:24:29.312
And the winner of Mr. Little Italy...
01:24:29.600 --> 01:24:30.600
What?
01:24:35.840 --> 01:24:38.036
Uh, you might wanna
just give it another second.
01:24:38.120 --> 01:24:39.634
I'm telling you, it's done.
01:24:40.760 --> 01:24:42.558
It's coming down to the wire now, people!
01:24:42.680 --> 01:24:44.592
- See?
- Good call.
01:24:45.200 --> 01:24:46.953
Ten, nine...
01:24:47.200 --> 01:24:49.157
Eight, seven,
01:24:49.240 --> 01:24:52.312
six, five, four,
01:24:52.440 --> 01:24:55.274
three, two, one!
01:24:58.360 --> 01:25:00.113
- Come on, Leo!
- Nikki!
01:25:00.840 --> 01:25:03.160
Nicely done!
01:25:03.320 --> 01:25:04.993
They look great. Great!
01:25:05.120 --> 01:25:07.157
Please, Chef Nicoletta. Please.
01:25:07.240 --> 01:25:09.056
- Take to the stage.
- Thank you very much. Chef.
01:25:09.080 --> 01:25:10.594
Chef? Okay.
01:25:13.400 --> 01:25:14.516
Oh! Looks good.
01:25:15.360 --> 01:25:16.480
Look at the bottom!
01:25:16.600 --> 01:25:18.976
What are you looking for,
a serial number? Just eat it!
01:25:19.000 --> 01:25:20.912
No matter which piece,
they're all perfect.
01:25:27.160 --> 01:25:28.616
- He likes it. He likes it!
- How do you know?
01:25:28.640 --> 01:25:30.393
How do you know?
- The jacket's blooming.
01:25:31.680 --> 01:25:34.070
This side.
01:25:49.560 --> 01:25:50.760
Here we go. Here we go.
01:25:56.480 --> 01:25:58.136
All right, this was
a very difficult decision,
01:25:58.160 --> 01:25:59.674
but the winner
01:26:00.280 --> 01:26:02.351
of Little Italy's best pizza
01:26:02.840 --> 01:26:04.797
is...
01:26:06.080 --> 01:26:08.356
Leo Campoli from Vince's "The Best" Pizza!
01:26:11.360 --> 01:26:12.999
- Yeah! You did it!
- No!
01:26:14.320 --> 01:26:17.233
Leo!
01:26:18.280 --> 01:26:19.953
It was so close.
01:26:20.160 --> 01:26:22.516
The crust, the sauce!
01:26:22.920 --> 01:26:25.560
It reminded me
of when your fathers were together.
01:26:30.680 --> 01:26:32.114
Yeah, try it! Try it!
01:26:55.120 --> 01:26:56.156
Excuse me!
01:26:57.200 --> 01:26:58.998
I'm sorry, but we can't accept
this trophy.
01:26:59.080 --> 01:27:01.675
Whoa, whoa! No, no, no! Wait. Wait.
We accept, we accept.
01:27:01.760 --> 01:27:03.816
Whoa! No, you heard what he said.
He can't accept. Nikki wins!
01:27:03.840 --> 01:27:06.440
- You're not gonna steal this!
- What steal? Your own kid said it!
01:27:06.680 --> 01:27:08.239
It wouldn't be right, Pa!
01:27:08.680 --> 01:27:11.149
You don't understand! It's not my pizza.
01:27:12.400 --> 01:27:15.438
Nikki, she must have switched
our sauce with theirs.
01:27:15.880 --> 01:27:18.600
That pizza, the winning pizza,
that's got my crust
01:27:19.280 --> 01:27:21.192
and the Angioli family sauce.
01:27:23.000 --> 01:27:24.400
Can we get Nikki back up here?
01:27:24.920 --> 01:27:27.515
- Nikki?
- She's gone, Leo,
01:27:27.960 --> 01:27:29.440
to the airport.
01:27:33.240 --> 01:27:35.960
Whoa, whoa. Leo, wait a minute.
Think about this.
01:27:36.040 --> 01:27:37.136
- Where are you going?
- Take a guess.
01:27:37.160 --> 01:27:38.480
Go get her, kid!
01:27:39.200 --> 01:27:41.192
Hey! Time for you to be Rocky.
01:27:46.320 --> 01:27:47.720
Adrian!
01:27:49.800 --> 01:27:52.315
You destroyed your friendship,
we didn't say anything.
01:27:52.400 --> 01:27:55.234
You destroyed our business,
and we still didn't say anything.
01:27:55.320 --> 01:27:58.233
- But this is where we draw the line.
- You are gonna go to the airport
01:27:58.320 --> 01:28:01.119
and you are gonna fix this,
or you are gonna lose your kids!
01:28:04.520 --> 01:28:06.637
- Andiamo!
- Go, the two of yous!
01:28:06.760 --> 01:28:07.955
- Go on!
- The two of yous!
01:28:09.040 --> 01:28:10.759
- Hey, wait for us!
- Oh!
01:28:23.640 --> 01:28:24.471
Thank you.
01:28:29.240 --> 01:28:31.550
Hi, Chef. It's Nikki. Nicole.
01:28:32.200 --> 01:28:34.237
Thank you so much
for giving me this opportunity.
01:28:34.320 --> 01:28:36.915
I got my visa, and I am on my way
to make my pitch
01:28:37.040 --> 01:28:38.793
personally to you as soon as I land.
01:28:46.720 --> 01:28:50.600
All laptops, shoes, belts and fluids.
You know the drill.
01:28:51.600 --> 01:28:52.600
Ramone!
01:28:52.680 --> 01:28:54.956
- What's up, girl?
- Get back to work!
01:28:55.040 --> 01:28:57.157
Relax, Terelle. I need a new profile pic.
01:28:57.240 --> 01:28:58.754
It's great light. Look at this.
01:29:05.480 --> 01:29:06.816
Let's go!
01:29:06.840 --> 01:29:08.399
- Hold on tight!
- Hey, lady!
01:29:08.480 --> 01:29:09.596
Leo! Quick!
01:29:09.680 --> 01:29:11.353
- Move!
- Out of the way! Out of the way!
01:29:11.440 --> 01:29:12.920
Keep going! Excuse me!
01:29:15.680 --> 01:29:16.680
Nikki?
01:29:17.160 --> 01:29:18.160
I'm sorry.
01:29:19.440 --> 01:29:21.397
Come on. No hold ups. Let's go.
01:29:25.200 --> 01:29:27.396
Sweetie? Step back through.
01:29:33.760 --> 01:29:35.513
All right.
01:29:37.480 --> 01:29:40.200
Yeah, a bracelet will do it.
Yeah. That, too.
01:29:40.280 --> 01:29:41.111
And you can go.
01:29:41.200 --> 01:29:42.776
Yeah, you don't want her
to go to town on you
01:29:42.800 --> 01:29:44.598
- with that latex glove.
- Yeah.
01:30:00.840 --> 01:30:01.840
Nikki!
01:30:05.480 --> 01:30:06.516
Don't go.
01:30:07.080 --> 01:30:09.675
You won, Leo. You got what you wanted.
01:30:10.120 --> 01:30:12.032
And I know what I want,
and it's in London.
01:30:12.440 --> 01:30:14.113
The only thing I want
01:30:14.880 --> 01:30:15.950
is you.
01:30:17.680 --> 01:30:18.716
Nikki, please!
01:30:19.400 --> 01:30:20.400
Stay.
01:30:20.960 --> 01:30:22.155
See what we could be.
01:30:24.280 --> 01:30:27.956
Girl, go to London.
Don't change your plans for no man.
01:30:28.040 --> 01:30:30.157
Nikki! Nikki!
01:30:30.240 --> 01:30:33.358
Nikki, what are you doing?
Don't let this coccola drive you away!
01:30:33.440 --> 01:30:35.736
She's not running away from him.
She's running away from you!
01:30:35.760 --> 01:30:37.160
Will you two be quiet?
01:30:40.880 --> 01:30:42.599
Nothing is gonna change!
01:30:44.120 --> 01:30:45.634
Especially not them.
01:30:46.280 --> 01:30:47.760
It doesn't matter about them.
01:30:47.840 --> 01:30:49.115
I've changed.
01:30:50.240 --> 01:30:51.993
And I'm not afraid to tell you that
01:30:52.800 --> 01:30:54.120
I'm in love with you.
01:30:55.480 --> 01:30:56.709
I always have been.
01:30:57.920 --> 01:30:59.070
I always will be.
01:31:01.320 --> 01:31:03.152
I'm not afraid to tell my father that
01:31:03.560 --> 01:31:04.914
I want to start my own shop.
01:31:05.000 --> 01:31:07.151
- What?
- It's about time!
01:31:11.040 --> 01:31:12.880
I mean, all this time,
you never said anything,
01:31:12.960 --> 01:31:17.432
and now that I'm about to get on a plane,
you finally find the words.
01:31:17.760 --> 01:31:19.035
Love isn't words.
01:31:19.760 --> 01:31:20.910
It's actions.
01:31:21.920 --> 01:31:24.037
All right?
That's why you let me win today.
01:31:25.680 --> 01:31:26.716
And you know what?
01:31:27.160 --> 01:31:29.436
I don't want us
to have to let each other win.
01:31:29.680 --> 01:31:31.080
I want us to both win.
01:31:31.960 --> 01:31:34.794
Together. Please, Nikki. Stay.
01:31:36.080 --> 01:31:37.196
Not for me,
01:31:37.840 --> 01:31:38.840
with me.
01:31:43.160 --> 01:31:44.480
What's it gonna be, girl?
01:31:51.560 --> 01:31:53.216
This is the final boarding call
01:31:53.240 --> 01:31:55.709
for flight 7-2-0 to Manchester.
01:31:56.280 --> 01:31:59.239
Final boarding for flight 7-2-0
to Manchester.
01:31:59.560 --> 01:32:00.914
Boarding Gate 25.
01:32:09.280 --> 01:32:10.396
Then it's done.
01:32:12.200 --> 01:32:13.429
I think I'm gonna cry.
01:32:14.920 --> 01:32:16.195
Me, too.
01:32:24.960 --> 01:32:25.960
What?
01:32:26.240 --> 01:32:27.720
I had to get my luggage.
01:32:45.120 --> 01:32:46.713
I've loved you all my life.
01:32:49.600 --> 01:32:51.432
Now, what are we gonna do about them?
01:32:54.520 --> 01:32:56.273
Pa, Sal.
01:32:56.640 --> 01:32:58.536
Isn't it time you tell us
what this fight is all about?
01:32:58.560 --> 01:33:00.517
- No! No!
- No.
01:33:00.600 --> 01:33:03.115
- Yes!
- Or I'm getting on a plane with Nikki.
01:33:06.680 --> 01:33:07.680
Fine.
01:33:08.200 --> 01:33:09.350
Fine, do you wanna know?
01:33:10.960 --> 01:33:12.792
All right. So, you wanna know?
01:33:14.520 --> 01:33:15.874
It's about them.
01:33:17.720 --> 01:33:18.915
Us?
01:33:22.640 --> 01:33:25.314
And the winner
of The Best Pizza of Little Italy is...
01:33:25.400 --> 01:33:28.393
Pizza Napoli!
01:33:28.480 --> 01:33:30.440
Hey, guys, give us the name
of your winning pizza!
01:33:30.800 --> 01:33:33.190
Wait, wait, wait.
We gotta think of a name.
01:33:33.280 --> 01:33:35.954
- It's easy. Pizza Franca.
- No, no, no. Wait.
01:33:36.040 --> 01:33:38.396
It's better, uh... Pizza Carlo.
01:33:38.480 --> 01:33:39.630
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
01:33:39.720 --> 01:33:41.996
No. You see, my mother made
the award-winning sauce,
01:33:42.080 --> 01:33:44.037
so it's Pizza Franca. Perfect.
01:33:44.680 --> 01:33:46.990
Yeah, but it's my father's crust.
01:33:47.080 --> 01:33:49.276
Look at this. What is this?
Without my mother's sauce,
01:33:49.360 --> 01:33:51.556
this is nothing!
This is a McDonald's hamburger bun.
01:33:53.560 --> 01:33:55.916
Well, your mother's sauce
without my father's crust,
01:33:56.000 --> 01:33:58.117
you know what this is?
Campbell's Tomato Soup!
01:33:59.360 --> 01:34:00.430
Eat this!
01:34:04.320 --> 01:34:06.960
I don't want a pizza named after me!
- Me neither.
01:34:07.040 --> 01:34:08.554
We were just trying to show respect.
01:34:08.640 --> 01:34:10.836
- Honor our families.
- What honor?
01:34:10.920 --> 01:34:14.960
So that some idiot could say
that Carlo was so cheesy,
01:34:15.040 --> 01:34:16.235
he plugged me right up?
01:34:16.320 --> 01:34:20.030
Or even worse, I ate a Franca
for lunch two days in a row!
01:34:20.480 --> 01:34:23.154
Now, you two knuckleheads, love and honor
01:34:23.440 --> 01:34:25.750
has nothing to do with your selfish pride,
01:34:25.840 --> 01:34:28.036
or my crust or her sauce.
01:34:28.120 --> 01:34:30.476
- My sauce is very good.
- Your sauce is delicious.
01:34:30.600 --> 01:34:32.536
- Look at you two. You are family.
- It's the best.
01:34:32.560 --> 01:34:33.560
- Family, huh?
- Yeah.
01:34:33.600 --> 01:34:35.080
No, they were brothers.
01:34:35.160 --> 01:34:37.994
And for your information, you truly are.
01:34:38.280 --> 01:34:40.670
That's right. Even now, more than ever.
01:34:40.760 --> 01:34:43.116
He put a ring on it! I'm Beyoncé.
01:34:43.200 --> 01:34:45.396
Oh, Papa!
01:34:46.280 --> 01:34:48.158
- Nonna!
- Call me Jay-Z.
01:34:48.400 --> 01:34:50.995
- Oh, it's so wonderful!
- Oh, thank you!
01:34:51.240 --> 01:34:53.630
- Nonno!
- You know I love you, kid.
01:34:54.640 --> 01:34:56.154
- Shut up.
- You shut up.
01:35:01.160 --> 01:35:03.216
- Yes, we do! I love you, honey!
- Listen up, people.
01:35:03.240 --> 01:35:05.038
Operations have resumed!
01:35:05.120 --> 01:35:09.000
- All laptops, belts, shoes...
- Okay! Let's get out of here!
01:35:13.160 --> 01:35:15.038
Thanks. Just keep 'em coming, Jessie.
01:35:15.880 --> 01:35:18.156
- Everything's good, yeah?
- It's perfect.
01:35:22.800 --> 01:35:26.077
And so our life in Little Italy
began all over again.
01:35:26.400 --> 01:35:28.119
A better version.
01:35:31.200 --> 01:35:34.352
- Chef, are you tearing up?
- Oh, good God, no. I'm British.
01:35:35.120 --> 01:35:37.476
I just can't believe
that I came all this way
01:35:37.560 --> 01:35:40.439
to lure back my favorite student,
and I'm failing.
01:35:41.160 --> 01:35:43.516
- Gareth's menu didn't work out?
- Oh, on the contrary.
01:35:43.600 --> 01:35:47.071
It worked its way out
of a top food critic's colon so quickly,
01:35:47.160 --> 01:35:48.753
I was forced to shut down.
01:35:49.680 --> 01:35:51.034
I'm sorry to hear that.
01:35:51.120 --> 01:35:53.112
I'm sure you'll find
another concept you like.
01:35:56.400 --> 01:35:57.629
I think I just did.
01:35:59.560 --> 01:36:02.951
Are you interested in going international?
01:36:04.000 --> 01:36:06.276
Attention, single ladies!
01:36:06.360 --> 01:36:08.272
The bride's gonna toss the bouquet!
01:36:08.360 --> 01:36:10.477
- Come on, Chef! Let's go!
- All right, come on!
01:36:21.520 --> 01:36:22.670
Oh, my God!
01:36:23.760 --> 01:36:25.831
- Hey!
- Stop it!
01:36:30.920 --> 01:36:33.833
Oh, Carlo! I've got something to tell you.
01:36:33.920 --> 01:36:36.151
- What, honey?
- I'm pregnant.
01:36:36.240 --> 01:36:39.199
What? She says she's pregnant!
01:36:47.560 --> 01:36:50.917
- Jogi, may I have this dance? Yeah.
- Me? Be gentle.
01:36:51.000 --> 01:36:53.640
Jessie, will you dance with me?
You look beautiful.
01:36:59.040 --> 01:37:00.679
Holy cow.
01:37:11.160 --> 01:37:13.629
Life may take you
to distant places...
01:37:13.920 --> 01:37:15.496
But it's love that brings you home.
01:37:15.520 --> 01:37:17.591
We may not have it all together...
01:37:17.680 --> 01:37:20.036
- But together...
- We have it all.
01:37:21.200 --> 01:37:24.477
So, you finally gonna tell me
the secret to your nonna's sauce?
01:37:24.560 --> 01:37:27.155
I told you. It's two teaspoons...
01:37:27.240 --> 01:37:28.896
- Oh, my goodness. Seriously?
- ... of nunya!
01:37:28.920 --> 01:37:31.230
Nunya business!
01:37:44.480 --> 01:37:46.080
Forty-seventh take there. On mark.
01:37:46.160 --> 01:37:48.117
Oh, Franca!
01:37:48.360 --> 01:37:49.840
I love you!
01:37:49.920 --> 01:37:53.675
Oh, Carlo! Carlo! Carlo!
01:37:54.360 --> 01:37:57.159
I'm never gonna cut.
01:38:02.240 --> 01:38:03.913
My penis sack fell off.
01:38:04.680 --> 01:38:07.136
- The sack that holds my penis.
- That holds your rocket?
01:38:07.160 --> 01:38:08.560
It fell off.
01:38:08.640 --> 01:38:10.552
I have to put my penis back in the sack.
01:38:10.640 --> 01:38:13.360
I've been about to have
a laugh attack all day.
01:38:13.440 --> 01:38:15.272
This is sending me over the edge.
01:38:18.560 --> 01:38:21.997
Oh!
01:38:22.080 --> 01:38:24.754
Your boo-boo forgot!
Listen to me!
01:38:24.840 --> 01:38:26.560
- It's family...
- Do you wanna go have sex?
01:38:26.640 --> 01:38:28.154
Now?
01:38:30.680 --> 01:38:33.559
I love you. I love you.
01:38:33.640 --> 01:38:36.394
That's like, a very Italian accent.
01:38:36.480 --> 01:38:37.914
It doesn't sound like it to me.
01:38:38.000 --> 01:38:39.992
I'm just learning.
01:38:43.280 --> 01:38:47.240
- Is your hand on my ass?
- Yeah, I was hopin' you wouldn't notice.
01:38:47.840 --> 01:38:49.216
It's because you're taller than me.
01:38:49.240 --> 01:38:51.596
It'll be there a lot now.
That's not my hand.
01:38:51.880 --> 01:38:53.360
You wanna put your hand on my ass?
01:38:54.760 --> 01:38:56.956
Italian style.
01:39:00.840 --> 01:39:02.911
- I can do it!
- Stop!
01:39:03.040 --> 01:39:04.872
- I can't.
- You want help with that?
01:39:05.000 --> 01:39:06.275
Whoa.
01:39:07.000 --> 01:39:09.117
People think it's weird
being around dead bodies,
01:39:09.200 --> 01:39:11.192
but they're kind of like my friends.
01:39:11.480 --> 01:39:13.278
Friends with benefits, am I right?
01:39:13.880 --> 01:39:16.236
- I'm gonna pee.
- Is this Gina's?
01:39:27.320 --> 01:39:30.119
Damn! This is like an episode of Springer.
01:39:30.200 --> 01:39:31.936
- Need to say we're leaving at 7:00.
- All right.
01:39:31.960 --> 01:39:33.656
- Oh! I'm drunk.
- You all right? We've still got time.
01:39:33.680 --> 01:39:34.896
- You're drunk with me, aren't you?
- Stop!
01:39:34.920 --> 01:39:36.877
- I do this to you. Get over here.
- Stop!
01:39:45.600 --> 01:39:47.637
Maybe we should elope.
01:39:47.720 --> 01:39:50.997
- Please!
- Will you mother just leave?
01:39:51.640 --> 01:39:53.359
No more white people!
01:39:53.440 --> 01:39:55.397
- Woo!
- Whoa, baby!
01:39:55.480 --> 01:39:58.200
- Oh, yeah!
- Oh! Brother, here you go!
01:39:59.400 --> 01:40:01.995
Jogi's hotter
than the pizza in here, baby!
01:40:06.320 --> 01:40:08.676
Now, don't ask me to go down on one knee.
01:40:09.160 --> 01:40:12.437
As long as you don't ask me
to go down on both later.
01:40:12.800 --> 01:40:15.360
- No, only all fours.
- Oh, animale!
01:40:16.640 --> 01:40:18.096
- No.
- Is there anything hard in there
01:40:18.120 --> 01:40:19.554
that I need to know about?
01:40:20.040 --> 01:40:21.394
Even semi-hard?
01:40:21.480 --> 01:40:24.279
I'm just gonna check under your shirt.
I am right under that t-shirt,
01:40:24.360 --> 01:40:26.056
and I'm just gonna
check close to your nipple.
01:40:26.080 --> 01:40:27.480
- I'm around...
- That is my nipple.
01:40:27.560 --> 01:40:29.056
- There are people watching us right now.
- There's no...
01:40:29.080 --> 01:40:32.152
- I don't do this normally!
- Don't be a sack!
01:40:33.160 --> 01:40:35.595
I don't need help! I can do it!